Angels on the Moon
by Martha the Anorexic Ephalent
Summary: This is Breaking Dawn... almost entirely in Edward's perspective. Like Midnight Sun, you will be able to see into Edward's mind and learn how he really thinks of Bella... and how a few other people think, too. A few things are changed from the book... R
1. Preface & Engaged

**Disclaimer - **

**Me - So, since I'm writing this story, can I own the rights to Breaking Dawn ?**

**Disclaimer - No.**

* * *

Angels on the Moon

**PREFACE**

I've finally found someone I loved after all of these years; it's hard to believe that I, of all 'people', really get someone like her. She means more to me than anything else in this world. I can't even imagine my world without her. I was away from her once, and it was the darkest, deepest and most unbearable part of my life.

I seem to have caused her so much trouble. Near-death experiences day after day, week after week, time after time. What if I can't protect her this time? She says that she could run from someone she feared, she could try to fight someone she hated. But that fight could be lost. My whole life is set to protecting her from those types of killers – the enemies. But what if the killer is someone that she loves?

She wants it. There's nothing I can do; it would hurt her so much to take away someone she loves.

But how can she expect me to stand here and watch as it takes away her life, little by little? She won't run, she won't fight; because she says it would hurt it.

But how can she expect me to stand and watch her take her own life away? Does _she_ expect to live through this? Does she expect _me_ to live through this?

How could I, when this is all my fault?

**Chapter 1 – ENGAGED**

Bella is safe. Nothing will happen to her. I put her in the best protection I could; Alice would call me if anything came up, and Bella won't get into any trouble in her own home. No vampires are visiting, Victoria is eliminated, and that stupid mutt is long gone. Everything would be perfect, if only it didn't hurt Bella so much that he had disappeared. The posters around town didn't help. Looking at Jacob's face every time she drove by a store that happened to hang one up in the window, she was devastated. It was like she fell apart over and over again. It burned me to see her so upset, crying, and knowing that there was nothing I could do about it.

Yes, she'll be fine. There's no reason she should think about him now. But, she never does do what I expect, so I can't be sure. Maybe she will drive through town and see one of the posters? What if she saw someone as tall as him and was mistaken, for one minute, and lost some of her concentration and swerved into a pole? What if she got hurt? Or paralyzed? Or if she DIED?

No, that wouldn't happen. I tried to make sure of it. The car I left her would protect her, much better than that beat up truck of hers. If she hit a pole, the pole would be dented, not her. If she got in a crash, she could just drive away. She would be fine in a lightning storm, and if there was an attack on America, not only would she be protected from missiles, guns and bombs, but a tank could roll over the car, and she would be fine. The only thing she has to worry about hurting her is me.

A herd of deer suddenly stopped for a drink to the west. I ran, the burst of fresh air exhilarating to my lungs, even though it was unnecessary. I found them, and stopped, analyzing which ones were the largest, and picking my target. I silently sprung, and took down the huge buck that seemed to lead the rest. I felt the fire-hot blood run down my throat, and his body go limp in my arms. I then took down two more deer, and filled my stomach until it seemed that if I drank anymore, I wouldn't be able to move. I ran back to where Emmett was playing around with a bear, and hopped into the tree to watch impatiently. My recent meal sloshed uncomfortably through me, but at least the extra precautions meant that it would be all the easier to be around Bella, and I wouldn't have to hunt for another while.

I watched as Emmett dove and tackled the furious grizzly bear. He backed up a few steps, and waited for it to get up. The poor creature… it's times like these that I hate being a vampire. I'm glad that Emmett doesn't mind though, or at least, he doesn't mind the diet. When it comes to grizzly bears, that is. He doesn't seem to regret it at all… can he really still be upset over the lost match those years ago?

I chuckled, and he looked over, confused. The grizzly saw his chance, and he dove at Emmett. But even though he wasn't paying attention, he still had time to raise an arm and stop the bear from attacking. He had been playing his game for a while now; he was extremely grateful that the poor bear had wandered all the way to the forest near our house. The unsuspecting creature had no idea what was coming.

Emmett decided that it was finally time to leave the bear alone, and so he finished it off, finally letting it fade away in peace.

Peace. It seems that Bella and I will finally have a chance to rest, and she's no longer on any hit-list. Except for my own.

I sighed. Poor Bella. Her expectations are so high, and she seems to think that she'll be fine after our… honeymoon. I wish she could see that it's not that easy. I don't have that much control. But I agreed to it anyways, being incredibly selfish, as usual. At least we have the wedding…

It was going to be fantastic. Alice appreciated that Bella was letting her run it, and she was working as hard as she could to get everything ready. Esme helped too, of course, and to my surprise, so did Bella's mother, Renee. Poor Charlie never expected her to be so into the wedding plans. The day he found out, he thought that she would be the one to flip out and get angry about it. Smiling, I remembered the night that we told Charlie…

* * *

I could hear the chief's cruiser from a distance. When it finally pulled in the driveway, Bella started to shake. She tucked her hand under her leg, slid it into her pocket, and then looked at me as I held her hand in my own.

"Stop fidgeting, Bella. Please try to remember that you're not confessing to a murder here."

"Easy for you to say."

Hah. She had no idea. I knew that this was going to go well, thanks to Alice and her visions. But Bella never asked, so I never told her. She was going to have to react as if she had no help from the supernatural. At least she didn't see it coming; it was obvious. Her heart rate accelerated as Charlie walked up to the house. Obviously, she wasn't so confident. I could barely hear the pauses between her heart beats as Charlie turned the key in the already open door.

"Calm down, Bella," I whispered. My attempts of rubbing circles in her hand weren't working.

When Charlie opened the door, she jumped a mile. I chuckled softly under my breath, too low for her to hear.

"Hey, Charlie," I called, listening to his thoughts.

_Edward's here again? Why can't Bella just leave the boy alone._

"No!" Bella protested softly, interrupting 'Charlie's' train of thought.

"What?"

"Wait till he hangs his gun up!"

I chuckled a bit louder this time, running my hand through my messy hair.

Charlie came around the corner. He still had his gun in his hands, much to Bella's dismay. He quickly wiped a grimace of his face when he saw us sitting together on the loveseat.

_I don't know how much more of this I can take. But it's what Bella wants, so I'm going to have to try to like him anyways. Well, here goes nothing…_

He attempted to smile, but it turned out as another grimace. "Hey kids. What's up?"

I smiled back. "We'd like to talk to you. We have some good news."

_Good news? Bella doesn't look very happy… if that boy knocked her up, I'll have him sent to prison! Good news? It better be GOOD._

"Good news?" He growled, turning his glare from Bella to me.

"Have a seat, Dad," Bella choked. If only she was a better actor… I knew Charlie's thoughts before I heard them.

_He knocked my Bells up! But wait now Charlie, get a hold of yourself. This is my Bella we're talking about here. Don't jump to conclusions… interrogate them. Gather ALL the evidence._

He then looked back to Bella, and decided to take her advice. He sat down on the very edge of the recliner.

"Don't get worked up, Dad," Bella coaxed. "Everything's okay."

I grimaced. Everything's okay? OKAY? This is much more than okay, Bella should know that. This is _perfect_. This is _wonderful_. This is going to be the most _glorious_ day of my life. Unfortunately, Charlie didn't think so, or at least, he didn't think so by the look of Bella's face.

"Sure it is, Bella, sure it is. If everything is so great, then why are you sweating bullets?"

He had a point.

"I'm not sweating," Bella lied.

I chuckled again under my breath as she tucked her head into my chest. She attempted to secretly wipe the hand across the back of her forehead, but it didn't work. I noticed.

Charlie noticed, too.

_That's enough. Bella's scared, Edward's perfectly fine with everything… he must not care in the least._

I CARE!

_Bella… my poor Bella… Bells is pregnant! I'M GOING TO KILL HIM!_

"You're pregnant!" he screamed. "You're pregnant, aren't you!

He glared at me. Of course that would be my fault, if it could ever happen. Little did he know how genetically impossible that was. But Charlie didn't know that, and I didn't get upset in the least about what he was thinking.

_I'll kill him now! How dare he! He's obviously going to leave poor Bella all alone. He knocked up my daughter! MY BABY! I'll KILL him!_

His hand twitched towards his gun. I hope he doesn't shoot me. I wouldn't mind in the least, of course, but he might want to know why the bullet would just bounce right off. That could get us into some trouble.

"No! Of course I'm not!" Bella interrupted him. I guess she was right after all; people would jump to this conclusion. I don't understand why, people always used to get married at eighteen, or even younger. It was never because of pregnancy, but because of everything Bella and I are lucky enough to have now. Love. She laughed out loud and rolled her eyes at that, though… apparently, not all teens this day think about things my way. Good thing, too, because they would be awfully confused with all of the extra voices.

"Oh. Sorry," he muttered, finally satisfied with the fact that Bella couldn't lie if her life depended on it.

"Apology accepted," Bella replied, finally taking another breath.

There was a long pause. I looked to Bella, a slight smirk on my face. Then she looked around and realized that she should speak. The horrified look on her face almost made me laugh out loud. I smiled to her, and then looked at Charlie.

"Charlie, I realize that I have gone about this out of order. Traditionally, I should have asked you first. I mean no disrespect, but since Bella has already said yes and I don't want to diminish her choice in the matter, instead of asking you for her hand, I'm asking you for your blessing. We're getting married, Charlie. I love her more than anything in the world, more than my own life, and -- by some miracle-- she loves me that way, too. Will you give us your blessing?"

At that moment, I was positive that everything would be alright. The words that I had said to myself over and over in my head in the past few days finally made sense to me. Bella wanted me. It was all I ever wanted and more. She's giving me everything, and now most of the obstacles are out of our way... except for the honeymoon.

The change in Charlie's skin colour brought me back from my daze. It changed from fair to red, red to purple, purple to blue. His thoughts were just as jumbled and uncomprehensive as his facial expressions.

_Bella? Married? Bella? My... Bells? Married?! No baby... that's good. But married? Married?! Not the same mistake... NO! BELLA! NO!_

Bella was about to comfort him when I took her hand to keep her back.

"Give him a minute." He just needed to rant in his own little head for a while, so he could calm down.

_I'll KILL him! Right now! I'll shoot the stupid kid! He has no right, my Bella! Who does he think he is? I'll kill him now! The poor doctor... he and his stupid son. But... there's not going to be a baby. Yet. No Charlie, not Bella. There's not going to be a baby. There's not going to be a baby..._

His skin slowly changed back to his regular colour. When he finally decided not to shoot me, I relaxed. The bullet would probably end up hitting Bella or something after it bounced off of my skin, knowing her luck.

_There's not going to be a baby._

Feeling me relax, Bella relaxed at my side. She seemed to understand that Charlie was better... well, it was obvious. He was now breathing.

_There's not going to be a baby. _

Charlie finally stopped worrying and started thinking about what will happen to Bella and I. He was pretty far off the mark, but I wasn't about to say anything about that. That would be a great conversation...  
"_Oh, Charlie, we're not only getting married, but I'm going to sleep with your daughter, too. She'll probably die, but she doesn't care. Then I'm going to turn her into a vampire and you'll never get to see her again. Bye-bye Charlie, she runs with the vampires now."  
_I almost smiled at the thought. Yes, it was a very good thing that Charlie was off the mark.

_Well, it's her choice anyways. I'll be a good father. I'll stick by her side, for better and for worse. She'll be fine... she'll still be my Bella, just a.. Cullen. Eugh._

"Guess I'm not that surprised," he grumbled. "Knew I'd have to deal with something like this soon enough,"

Bella finally breathed again, much to my relief.

"You sure about this?" He asked Bella, his eyes deep and questioning, and then glared at me.

"I'm one hundred percent sure about Edward." I rolled my eyes. Of course she won't lie and say she's sure about the wedding. The only thing she's apparently sure about is the sure-to-be-disasterous after-party.

"Getting married though? What's the rush?" I smiled. He probably also wouldn't like to know that the rush is that she would like to stay a teenager so she could be closer to my age. Although, I'm technically older than his grandparents. But, once again, that is not a story that anyone else will ever be aloud to hear. The public story is the one that counts.

"We're going away to Dartmouth together in the fall, Charlie," I reminded him. "I'd like to do that the right way. It's how I was raised."

It's amazing how uninformed he is. He barely knows anything.

"Knew this was coming," he muttered. Then he thought of something.

I was surprised that I was able to contain my laughter. Bella looked to me, and back to Charlie, clearly worried that she was missing out on something important.

"Dad?"

All of the sudden, Charlie's face became very clear and bemused. Poor Bella, she'll never see this coming, although she knows it has to be done.

"Ha! Ha, ha, HA!" Bella nearly toppled out of the chair at Charlie's sudden outburst in laughter. She looked to me, but I was giving nothing away, except for the fact that my lips were pressed tightly and I was shaking a small bit myself.

"Okay, fine," Charlie choked out. "Get married."

Bella's shocked expression was almost as priceless as the day Tyler mentioned prom.

"But..."

"But what?" Bella demanded, impatient from having to wait too long.

"But _you_ have to tell your mom! I'm not saying one word to Renée! That's all yours!" He continued laughing as Bella stood there, more shocked then before.

* * *

Fortunately, Renée accepted it well, just as Alice had predicted. Bella was shocked. She could hardly contain her enjoyment when she let me know that Renée not only accepted it, but she was also going to help with the wedding! She spent hours everyday on the phone with Esme. Carlisle was secretly a little bit miffed, the wedding was taking away some of their time. But no one in the house, even Carlisle and Rosalie, was ever less happy then we were now. Especially me.

All of the sudden, Emmett tackled me out of the tree. I crashed into a boulder, smashing it in two and plowing 2 feet into the ground.

"HAH! I got you! That's a first! I should thank Bella, maybe now I'll be able to surprise you more than once in a blue moon! I can't wait till she's one of us, you won't be able to keep anything away --"

He was cut off by my growl. I didn't want _anyone _thinking about my Bella like that. He will have to keep his hands off of her...

"Easy, bro. I was just kidding. You're really still that overprotective of her? You know I only scare her a little..."

He was cut off again by my glare.

"Fine. But I'll get you back."

We spent the run home bickering about my bachelor's party. I don't see the point of it, I'm not going to miss anything once I'm married. But Emmett and Jasper weren't exactly planning on taking no for and answer, according to Alice.

We returned to the house. It was surprisingly very empty, I could only smell Jasper and Esme.

"Where's everyone at?" I asked under my breath, knowing someone could hear.

Jasper popped down off of the stairs. "Carlisle got called into work, and Rosalie is gone shopping for the wedding. Alice didn't go, surprisingly. She had to go to the final fit for Bella and Charlie."

"Ahh, I see,"I replied. That explains it. Alice will be in a fit if they so much as pick out one thing that's not perfect... I'm surprised she didn't postpone the trip.

I sauntered over to my piano absentmindedly. I started to thrum my fingers across the keys, and then floated into my favorite tune while trying to pass the remaining hours until Charlie was asleep. The familiar music was comforting to my head, and it started to drown out the thoughts of everyone else.

As usual, Esme stopped to listen. She really likes this song, and I can see why. It's my best composition by far. It's perfect in every way, but only because it's written for someone that's just as equally flawless.

Bella.

Bella's Lullaby.

* * *

**AN - This is my first fanfic chapter ever! I hope you like it! Please rate and review, and I would greatly appreciate anything that anyone has to say. I will be adding more information about the title later, I already have some on my profile, so if you're curious, check it out!**

**I'll try to update soon. But right now, I need some help/opinions!**

**What should Edward, Emmett and Jasper do on the bachelor party ?**

**What should Mike be thinking at the wedding ?**

**I also need a beta reader. Anyone interested ?**

**I greatly appreciate anyone that's reading this right now. Thank you so much, and please help me out !**


	2. Long Night

**AN - I'm not going to rant in this space anymore, I'm just going to post disclaimers, because I read a story with some really funny ones, and I wanted to try!! And, this is the end of chapter two ! (finally) !!!**

**Me - **invents new type of food****

**You - This is really good, what do you call it?**

**Me - Breaking Dawn.**

**You - Oh, I see.**

**Me - Do I have the rights to Breaking Dawn now ?**

**Disclaimer - No.**

* * *

"I miss you already," Bella murmured.

"I don't need to leave. I can stay…." I wished for nothing but that at this moment. But Alice had seen me at the party…

"Mmm."

Everything was quiet, well, quieter than usual. Except for Bella's heart. It stuttered and skipped and pranced along, hammering. Bella's sweet hot breath was ragged against my own. I could not only feel her hot lips against my own, but I could hear the sweet whispers that they made as they brushed against my own lips of frozen steel.

Just through the hallway, I could hear Charlie's even breaths and the steady beating of his proud heart. His dream was quiet and steady, taking place by a smooth, even brook filled with lots of salmon. He was using a fishing rod that looked to be made of pure gold, and he reeled it in to find a fish that was much bigger than you would expect to find in such a sweet brook. I smiled – he's so peaceful.

Down the street, I could hear soft music playing – a violin. They were playing a piece by Beethoven, but I could hear many mistakes, and I assumed they were just learning. My assumption was confirmed in their thoughts.

There were many other sounds – a television with the sound turned down, and two steadily beating hearts accompanied by two different sets of relaxed, even breaths. It seems that the young couple watching the television had fallen asleep to the romantic film they were watching.

Across the road, there was a young girl fixing up two cups of hot cocoa. She was making some for her and her older sister, who was upstairs changing. I quickly ducked out of the house and gave her privacy.

The other parts of my brain were still focused on Bella. I was extremely careful not to move too quickly or to do anything to frighten her. I would not hurt her. It was much easier now, I haven't wanted or felt a need for her blood since the dark days when I had thought that I had lost her forever. But my throat still hurt, as always.

It was so easy to be able to become lost with Bella. I knew I had to keep my concentration, but it gets more difficult everyday, every second. I thought it would get easier, but no. My life just can't be that simple.

I opened my eyes and looked at Bella's peaceful face. Her long lashes were closed over her beautiful chocolate eyes. To look into Bella's eyes was like looking into Bella's soul; you could see the person she truly was inside. You could see all of her honesty, her compassion, and her glorious beauty. You could see love… all of the reasons why she loves, the passion she puts into everything she does, the pleasant warmth, and her true kindness. It's the only way to see into her complex mind; full of twists and turns and… it's incomparable. Bella's soul is simply…pulchritudinous, and that's something that I never want to take away from her.

She opened her eyes, and once more, I was drawn through them to her beautiful mind and soul. It makes no sense that someone with a soul so exquisite, so amazing, so – it's indescribable – why she wants me is something that I will never be able to understand. She is my angel, my sun. She changes everything about me, and has made my dark world of blackness bright again. She lit up all of the stars in the sky, simply by being her glorious, angelic self. She will always be an angel. And she changed me from the monster I used to be, to something more peaceful and quiet… something cold and dark – but not bad -- as she says.

She is my angel… and I am her moon. She's the pretty angel that flew through the night sky and then graced her presence on my moon.

She's my angel on the moon.

_Do you dream, that the world will know your name?  
So tell me your name._

If I could dream, all I would dream about is Bella. She's the only thing in my world that I need, the only thing that mattersto me now. When she speaks my name… it feels like my cold dead heart starts beating again. She makes me feel like I'm truly alive.

_  
Do you care, about all the little things,  
or anything at all?_

If anything ever upsets her, it ruins me, too. It's impossible to be happy, when she's not. I could never let anything hurt her. If anything ever happened to her… she's so fragile. I can't let her be hurt, again. She's all I care about.

_  
I wanna feel, all the chemicals inside  
I wanna feel._

This love she's given me is simply unbelievable. It's like nothing I've ever felt before… it's heat. It's compassion. It's love… something that I have never felt before. I need it now, it's like how a human needs a heartbeat. I need the burning love for Bella in me forever.

_  
I wanna sunburn, just to know that I'm alive...  
To know I'm alive._

I don't want to have to leave Bella, ever. I did once before, and it ruined her, and me. She's all that matters to me, and that's why we're getting married. So that I can always feel the heat and love from her, forever.

She then pulled her face to my own again.

"Definitely staying…" I murmured a moment later.

She looked at me with her look of protest – no matter how hard she tried, it always had a sweet kitten-y look to it.

"No! No, it's your bachelor party. You have to go." The words were hardly out of her mouth when she had her arms wrapping around me, tangled in my hair, and pressed against my back. She was so soft… so smooth. I stroked her warm face with my dead hands.

"Bachelor parties are designed for those who are sad to see the passing of their single days. I couldn't be more eager to have mine behind me. So there's really no point."

It was true. Bella had to agree…

"True."

Hah, I read her again. But the words I spoke were completely honest. I could care less about my 'single days'. They were horrible and dark and lonely. But then I met Bella…

Besides, I really didn't like what Emmett and Jasper had planned for me. I knew Bella wouldn't find out, and I could hardly allow it to happen. I was NOT going.

She then ran her smooth hand down my stone chest. An electric current ran through my body, and shivers ran up and down my spine. I kissed her again as her sweet scent rolled through my nose. I ignored it, even as it burned my throat. She then pressed her sweet hot tongue against my lip, and the craving became so intense, I could hardly bear it. Not the craving for her blood, but for more of her. This was my automatic signal that I had to stop before this went too far. I pulled back, much to her dismay.

"Wait," she said, gripping my shoulders and pulling me to her. Her leg wrapped around my waist.

"Practice makes perfect!" she smiled.

Silly Bella. "Well, we should be fairly close to perfection by this point then, shouldn't we? Have you slept at all in the last month?"

She dismissed my question easily. "But this is the dress rehearsal, and we've only practiced certain scenes. It's no time for playing safe."

I froze. No time for playing safe? Everything needs to be 'played safe'. Every touch, every kiss… anything but safe could mean death for her fragile body.

"Bella…"

"Don't start this again. A deal's a deal."

I've backed out on promises before. This promise was one that simply needed to be forgotten!

"I don't know. It's too hard to concentrate when you're with me like this. I – I can't think straight. I won't be able to control myself. You'll get hurt."

"I'll be fine."

No, you won't.

"Bella…"

"Shh!" Her sweet lips pressed to my own in seconds. Not thinking, I gave her the kiss she wanted. But as the horrible thoughts came back, I stopped. I still kissed her, but it was too difficult to think about it. There were other things on my mind.

This was much too dangerous. Bella has to consider that… I hope she changes her mind.

"How are your feet?" I asked.

She rolled her eyes.

"Toasty warm."

"Really? No second thoughts? It's not too late to change your mind…"

"Are you trying to ditch me?" she asked, with a hint of frustration in her voice. I chuckled.

"Just making sure. I don't want you to do anything you're not sure about." I'm not even sure about it… I never will be.

"I'm sure about you. The rest I can live through."

Bella… you don't know what you're trying to promise yourself. It's simply not that easy.

"Can you?" I whispered. "I don't mean the wedding – which I am positive you will survive despite your qualms – but afterward… what about Renée, what about Charlie?"

She sighed. I knew I hit a tough spot, and there was nothing she could do to hide it.

"I'll miss them." Of course she would. I couldn't imagine life with out Carlisle or Esme… but I'm sure that was a different type of bond.

"Angela and Jessica and Mike?"

"I'll miss my friends, too," she said softly, and then a hint of a smile crossed her face. "Especially Mike. Oh, Mike! How will I go on?"

I growled involuntarily. That was the bright side to this, I suppose. No more vile thoughts coming from Mike Newton. At least he wasn't picturing Bella anymore… but he still managed to get worse.

She laughed.

"Edward, we've been through this and through this. I know it will be hard, but this is what I want. I want you, and I want you forever. One lifetime is simply not enough for me."

"Frozen forever at eighteen?"

"Every woman's dream come true," she giggled. I wasn't convinced.

"Never changing… never moving forward."

"What does that mean?"

"Do you remember when we told Charlie we were getting married? And her thought you were… pregnant?"

"And he thought about shooting you?" she muttered. "Admit it – for one second, he honestly considered it."

I didn't answer. She was right, of course. She's always very apprehensive. But that wasn't what had bothered me the most…

"I just wish… well, I wish that he'd had been right."

"Gah," she gasped. But I continued.

"More that there was some way he _could _have been. That we had that kind of potential. I _hate _taking that away from you, too."

She paused, considering something. "I know what I'm doing." No, she didn't.

"How could you know that, Bella? Look at my mother, look at my sister. It's not as easy a sacrifice as you imagine."

"Esme and Rosalie get by just fine," she countered. "If it's a problem later, we can do what Esme did – we'll adopt."

I sighed. She simply didn't get it!

"It's not _right_! I don't want you to have to make sacrifices for me. I want to give you things, not take things away from you. I don't want to steal your future. If I were human–"

Her hands were suddenly over my lips. I wish that she had let me finish what I was saying… maybe she would have realized that she's making a mistake.

"_You _are my future," she said. "Now stop. No moping, or I'm calling your brothers to come and get you. Maybe you _need _a bachelor party."

"I'm sorry. I am moping, aren't I? Must be the nerves."

"Are _your_ feet cold?"

"Not in that sense. I've been waiting a century to marry you, Miss Swan. The wedding ceremony is the one thing I can't wait—"

I stopped midsentence when I heard a few very unpleasant thoughts.

"Oh, for the love of all that is holy!" I muttered. They can't be doing this.

"What's wrong?"

I gritted my teeth, "You don't have to call my brothers. Apparently Emmett and Jasper are not going to let me bow out tonight."

She held me close. I could feel her sweet breath against my cheek, and then she released me.

"Have fun," she smiled.

Then there was a dreadful squeal across the window. Emmett was scraping his steel hard nails down the pane, and it was horribly irritating. I can't believe they think that they are going to get away with this. Bella shuddered.

"If you don't send Edward out," Emmett hissed. "we're coming in after him!"

Bella chuckled. "Go. _Before _they break my house."

I rolled my eyes, but jumped up unwillingly. They have to be joking… they don't honestly think I'm going to participate in those shenanigans, do they? I pulled on my shirt, and kissed her soft forehead.

"Get to sleep. You've got a big day tomorrow," I whispered.

She smiled. "Thanks! That's sure to help me wind down."

I returned her grin. "I'll meet you at the altar."

"I'll be the one in white."

I chuckled. How blasé. "Very convincing." I then crouched, and sprang silently out the window, grabbing Emmett's collar as I went and pushing him to the ground. There was a soft thud, and Emmett muttered a very inappropriate word.

"You better not make him late," she muttered, too low for human ears. I was about to console her when Jasper put a hand in front of me.

_I'll handle this._

And I knew he would. He was swiftly up to the window in less than half a second.

"Don't worry, Bella. We'll get him home in plenty of time." He then let her relax, and through his mind, I saw her sink a little bit deeper into the covers. Jasper and his talent have been extremely useful around Bella lately, almost as helpful as Alice's. Although, while Alice and her visions are always truthful, Jasper playing around with Bella's emotions when he thought that I wouldn't notice has been extremely annoying, and embarrassing for poor Bella.

"Jasper? What do vampires do for bachelor parties? You're not taking him to a strip club, are you?"

No. They were not, as far as I could hear. Although, it was almost as bad.

"Don't tell her anything," Emmett growled. I rolled my eyes again and punched him to the ground. I laughed freely when I caught a look of his expression, but stopped abruptly when I heard his thoughts.

_Don't make me take you to a gay bar, Edward. You know _exactly _how bad it was last time._

I shivered at the uncomfortable memory. _That _was something I never wanted to remember.

"Relax," Jasper said, interrupting our silent debate. "We Cullens have our own version. Just a few mountain lions, a couple of grizzly bears, pretty much an ordinary night out."

Eugh. Yes, that was what we were doing… for the first few minutes. Emmett and his competitions… he really had to stop. This was getting out of hand!

"Thanks Jasper," Bella said quietly. He then smiled, and dropped from the window, clapping us each on the back.

"Let's go, boys," he said, and broke into a run to the east. I rolled my eyes and followed involuntarily.

***

We finally stopped when we reached the middle of a forest. I had no idea what we were doing here... I thought Jasper was kidding when he said we were hunting? Their thoughts were extremely unhelpful... they were obviously trying to hide something from me. I couldn't think of any other reason that Emmett would rethink about everything he did in Biology. Or even Jasper... I closed my eyes and tried to concentrate on their thoughts.

Emmett obviously noticed that I was concentrating on something, because he began thinking some very crude thoughts about himself and Rosalie. My eyes flew open and I jumped backwards 50 feet.

"EMMETT! STOP! That's disgusting!"

"I can't help it anymore, bro, there's so much to think about. Just get out of my head!"

"It's not that simple, trust me," I sighed. I only wished that I could get out of their heads, for just one moment. It would have saved me from so many permanently scarring images.

I shivered. Jasper was shaking silently with laughter, and he was still only thinking through math timetables. He was already at 57.

"Well," Emmett interrupted. "Now that we're here…"

I rolled my eyes. I did _not _want to be here. Obviously, everything they were thinking of before wasn't going to happen… Emmett was planning on taking us to a strip club – the one thing that Bella didn't like. He must have changed his mind after Alice had her vision…

"So," Emmett continued. "We're going to have a little competition. Don't even think about backing out, Edward, because if you don't win, I'm telling Bella where you're taking her!"

"You wouldn't," I snarled.

"Oh, I think I would. Anyways, if you do win, I won't… so you better try!"

At that point, I knew this wasn't going to be too bad. I saw a flash of a deer in Jasper's thoughts, and then he quickly attempted to forget about it. So, we actually were hunting. But how is that supposed to be a competition that Emmett would think up?

"We're going to be hunting. Whoever hunts the most animals in 10 minutes wins!"

Hmm. This is different. But there can't be any harm in this anyways, can there?

"Ready?" Jasper called.

This shouldn't be too bad.

"Get set…" Emmett continued.

I can do this.

"GO!" They both hollered.

I waited half a second to make sure that they were going to run. They did, and they were both gone in an instant. So I quickly followed, picking up the scent of a few deer just to the east.

I slid into the bushes and watched them slowly drink from the pond. All of the sudden, I leapt and had one down in an instant. I quickly grabbed the other and snapped his neck in my iron grip. While keeping the first deer against the grass with my foot, I finished off the one in my arms, and then the one on the ground. There was something off about the scent in his blood… one I recognized, but I didn't come across very often. I tried to forget about it knowing that if I didn't move quickly, Emmett or Jasper would finish first.

I then caught the scent of something a bit farther down the river that I instantly recognized. I smiled to myself and darted down the riverbank.

I stopped just before the scent and hopped into the higher branches. I smiled when I saw the great cat sleeping on a branch; this was going to be simple. I tackled him to the ground, but he barely stirred. Wow. The poor lion – maybe he fell into the water or something earlier? I pushed my teeth into the soft flesh of his neck, and felt his smooth bloodstream flowing underneath my hands. His heartbeat stuttered for a minute, and then continued to beat at it's slow pace.

His blood was off, too, much more than before. I crinkled my eyes in wonder, and then finished him off. I smelled another deer in the distance, and decided that I would go for that, too, even though my stomach was much more filled than it's ever been before.

"Time's up!" Emmett called.

I slowly turned and ran towards the sound of his voice. I caught his scent instantly, and ran back to where he and Jasper were standing.

Then I realized that the sides of my eyesight were blurring. Everything unfocused easily, and it reminded me of some dim human memories. It was harder to remember things then before, and I couldn't remember anything from the distant past at all.

I stepped into the clearing where they stood, their eyes wide and expectant. What on earth were they waiting for? I'm here! Their thoughts were oddly blank, and I could only pick out one or two words that they were thinking. That's not right… they had to be thinking about loads of things, did they win?

"How many animals did you get?" I slurred. Wow, my voice was off. Maybe I over drank?

"One deer for me… but Jasper couldn't, ah, find any," Emmett answered slowly. Then, under his breath, he muttered, "Somebody has to be responsible."

All of the sudden, it hit me.

Why my eyesight was blurry.

Why I couldn't think straight.

Why my speech was blurred.

Why my stomach felt more than slightly uncomfortable.

And why the scents of the deer and the lion were off.

They must've known that I would go for the lion, I always do. We're all extremely predictable when it comes to our meals…

I wonder how they did it. I suddenly felt very dizzy, and then I straightened myself up and tried to clear my mind as much as possible.

Then I caught a memory in Jasper's mind…

He was pushing a syringe through the neck of a deer. The dark brown liquid seeped into the deer's bloodstream, and in the background, you could see Emmett doing the same. Then his mind fluttered to another memory, one with a lion. There were about 9 stab wounds around the lion's neck.

They drugged them.

Well, not drugged specifically. They put pure, undiluted vodka into their systems.

The bastards spiked my drink.

"Hey Eddie-poo, how are you?" Emmett called.

I tried to growl, but it came out as more of a gurgle.

"Well, let's go," Jasper said. "We don't have all night."

Emmett smiled. "No, we don't. Let's go Edward; we're going to have a party!"

I smiled. Party? A party sounds like fun!

Wait, what am I thinking? A party with _Emmett_? This is exactly what I feared...

He then linked his arm around mine and dragged me through the trees before I could protest.

***

We entered the pretty club with the big flashing sign on the front. Emmett had convinced me on the way here that this was a brilliant idea, and that it would make everyone happy if we came to the club for a dance. I hope he doesn't expect me to do anything but dancing... this isn't a stip club... I don't think. There were poles, though. They looked strangely appealing... I wonder if I had ever used them before? I could barely remember anything at all, now. Maybe I'm an expert at this! I smiled, having convinced myself, and ran up to the table.

Then I tripped.

On a big, red purse.

"HEY! You knocked over my – " the tall blonde woman looked down at me with a scowl, and then her expression suddenly changed.

"Oh, sorry.. I.. umm, I didn't see you. H-how are you?"

I smiled a big lopsided smile. I met a new friend!

"I'm fine thanks, pretty lady. Come dance with me!"

I grabbed her arm and pulled her to the big, shiny pole. This was going to be different... I never do this normally. I normally could tell if there was something wrong with a situation. I couldn't see anything wrong with this, though. I actually couldn't see much at all... I blinked rapidly, and smiled. The pretty lady was following obediently. I could catch small glimpses of what she was thinking, and it made me want to go through with this all the more. I'll have to thank Emmett and Jasper later.

_Handsome... I wond... beautif... why me... enjoy thi...does he wan...do...have protection?_

I skidded to a halt. I might be out of it now, but I was _not_ stupid. She does _not_ think that I am just another drunk guy here to take advantage of her, does she?

"You duh knooww that we just dancinn, riiiighhhhttt?" I garbled. Eugh, she must think I'm about to pass out. I suddenly had a quick dizzy spell. I wonder if it's possible for vampires to actually pass out? She must think I'm crazy... I'll have to explain about things later.

"Y-y-yeah," she looked up into my eyes, almost frightened. I was immediately worried.

"You're nott scareddd, aree yo? I promi-not to hur-you. I swear I a ni-guy."

"N-n-n-no, let's just... umm, dance!"

I smiled again. I can give her that much, at least. I started pulling her onto the table. I suddenly felt woozy again, and I grabbed the pole for support. This was going to be difficult. I am _not_ an expert at this, no matter what I thought before. I suddenly realized that I actually had no idea at _all _what I was doing.

"How do you use thi-pole thhinggg?" I stuttered, confused.

She finally looked comfortable, for the first time that night. I looked down and finally noticed a long pair of black boots, a short skirt, and... _fishnets._Ahh, I understood why she was so confused earlier; this is not what she expected.

"OH, I've had _lots _of practice with these!" she laughed. She then swung her leg around the pole and started moving to the beat of the music. I attempted to imitate her moves, but they weren't going very swiftly for me. I managed to wrap my leg around it in two trys, but I couldn't seem to move to the right beats, and my hands kept slipping against the greasy pole. I frowned, and tried harder. How is this so effortless to her? I can do anything!

She spun out to the edge of the table, only holding on with one hand. I turned to watch how she did it, and saw Emmett and Jasper laughing next to my table and clapping me on. They must think I'm an idiot! I'll show them!

I spun twice as my newly acquired friend had. Unfortunately, my hand then slipped. I plummeted off the table, right into Jasper's arms.

Emmett fell to the floor, rolling in laughter. Jasper was shaking, too, and he pretended to struggle with my weight.

"Get back up there!" Emmett howled as Jasper pushed me up to the table again.

"Is this too difficult for you?" the pretty lady smiled, halting her dancing for a second.

"NO!" Nothing's too difficult for me! I'll be able to learn this in no time.

I walked back to the pole, eager for the challenge. I swung my leg over the pole, trying to be... well... scandalous! That's how all the other girls looked... and one guy. He had his blond hair spiked to the side, an eyebrow piercing, and his multicoloured pink shirt was almost glowing in certain places. His legs, twisted around the pole, didn't look very natural with his crisp, dark blue jeans.

All of the sudden, he jumped as high as he could up the pole, wrapped his legs around it, and slid to the bottom of it while spinning in circles effortlessly. Normally, I would have been disgusted... but it looked like so much fun!

I crouched to jump, and then I remembered that I could jump all the way to the ceiling! My spin will be much funner than I thought!

Unfortunately, that's when Emmett realized what I was planning. He debated, and then jumped up with me, and dragged over to him, just before I could spring. I was quite pissed, actually. He ruined my jump!

"Hey man, you shouldn't jump too high, it's not normal, remember?" he muttered.

Pfft, why should I try to act normal? I'm _not_. I rolled my eyes.

"So?"

"Well... umm, you would, ugh, scare your new friend!" he finally added. He seemed proud of himself for thinking of a reasonable answer. He was right, though, and I promised I wouldn't scare her. I don't like to break my promises.

"Fine."

I turned back to the pole, pushing Emmett back off of the table. Then I crouched, even though I didn't need to. It was all just a big show...

I jumped, managing to only go a foot higher then the other guy. I gripped the pole excitedly, waiting to slide down.

But I didn't. My cool hands were gripping the pole so tightly that I didn't move. I sighed, and let go.

But I didn't slide down... no, my life isn't that simple. My legs stuck to the pole, and then I flipped over backwards.

I crashed into the table, and then my legs slipped and I fell onto the floor. My face hit the leg of a chair. I pushed myself up, having felt nothing. Then I saw everyone in the club staring at me. Emmett and Jasper were at my sides, pretending to help me up.

"Pretend you're hurt, idiot!" Jasper hissed.

Oh. I just almost broke my neck... I suppose it would have hurt a little if I was human.

"Ow. My... arm! Hurt...?"

"Niiceeee, you stupid drunk bastard," Emmett said under his breath. He dropped the arm he was holding.

"Are you hurt, _buddy?" _Emmett scowled, loud enough for everyone to hear. Ughh, this is so stupid. They should have seen this coming.

"Yeahhhh... mi-arm."

I've had enough of this drunk thing. What the hell were they thinking, anyways?

All of the sudden, my stomach lurched. It felt like it did the day that I...

I then puked. Except... it was blood. It was darker than usual, though... it's probably just my "spiked drink". Unfortunately, no one else knew about this. They thought I was about to die.

"HOLY CRAP! CALL AN AMBULANCE!"

"SOMEONE DO CPR!"

"HE'S GUNNA DIE"

Emmett and Jasper froze. This was not going the way that they had planned. Fortunately, Jasper was a quick thinker.

"No, he's fine. He's had this condition since he was a kid, he coughs up blood everytime he hits... his stomach... hard. Our dad's a doctor, we'll just take him home."

The bartender walked over to him, obviously worried.

"Are you sure? I've never seen this before--"

"Yeah, we're positive," Emmett interrupted. He grabbed my arm and turn to go.

"Wait! This fell out of his pocket!" The pretty lady ran up to us and passed Emmett my phone.

"Thanks," Emmett muttered cooly. The poor girl... she must think I'm insane! I turned to apologize, thinking that if she were Bella, I wouldn't want her remembering me like that.

I stopped mid-turn, shocked. I suddenly realized why I had liked the "pretty lady" so much.

Her dark brown eyes glowed in the neon lights.

Her soft, wavy brown hair flowed easily while she danced.

Her eyebrows were slightly furrowed, like she was thinking about something.

She looked beautiful while she danced, but also soft and delicate.

"Are you okay?" she said, interrupting my thoughts.

I refocused my eyes on her face and muttered, "Yeah, you just remind me of my finacée."

The last thing I saw in the club was her stunned expression, and then Emmett and Jasper whisked me away.

***

(**AN - I have no idea what time the wedding actually is, it just says that Charlie is going to be picking up Mr. Webber at 3:00, so I'm going to make it 3:30... And the song is "Sweet dreams are made of this - Eurythmics")**

I was finally pushed through the door to my own home. I sighed, grateful. This nightmare was finally going to be over. Then I heard music...

That's odd. No one ever normally plays music at home, except for me.

_Sweet dreams are made of this  
Who am I to disagree?  
Travel the world and the seven seas  
Everybody's looking for something_

I gritted my teeth. This was obviously far from over. At least I could think straight - or at least, better than before. I still couldn't see, though... I wasn't much better.

_Some of them want to use you  
Some of them want to get used by you  
Some of them want to abuse you  
Some of them want to be abused_

Then Alice skipped into the room. She grabbed my arm, and spun herself around, dancing to the music. I refused to make anymore of a fool of myself that night, so I stayed still. I was extremely mad at her for not doing anything to stop Emmett and Jasper's plans, so I refused to get involved in her little game. She was so excited though, it was hard not to do anything. I finally just rolled my eyes, and then smiled at her own bright grin.

"Hey, Ed. Now before you flip out at me, I didn't know how bad it was going to be until you were at the lion, I swear! I would've stopped them... but I was busy with the wedding." Alice obviously foretold how bad it was going to be when I returned.

_Sweet dreams are made of this  
Who am I to disagree?_

"Was I furious at you Alice? Did I flip out and yell at everyone?" I tried to peek into her head past all of the blurriness, and I caught a glimpse of a vision where I stormed into the house, tripped over the couch, and then yelled at Alice for not moving the couch, and for not warning me about everything else.

_Travel the world and the seven seas  
Everybody's looking for something_

"Yes, can't you tell...? Oh my god, you can still hear me can't you?" Alice actually looked shocked. Nothing ever shocked Alice.

_Some of them want to use you  
Some of them want to get used by you_

"Barely," I muttered. The look on Alice's face threw me off right away. She lit up, and grinned. I thought she would be worried...

_Some of them want to abuse you  
Some of them want to be abused_

"Umm, that sucks. Anyways, come into the living room with us, we have a surprise for you!"

_Sweet dreams are made of this_

"Alice, there's no way I'm following through with this, not after tonight!"

_Who am I to disagree?_

"Yes, you are. I saw it. You agree after I threaten to tell Bella where you're going..." Eugh. This stupid secret is causing me more trouble than ever before!

_Travel the world and the seven seas_

"Fine Alice. But there's only so much that I can take..." I really can't handle this anymore.

_Everybody's looking for something_

"Don't worry, we're all doing it!" she grinned, then pulled me into the living room. I stopped, shocked.

Someone, probably Esme, had turned it into a giant twister board. The floors & walls were painted with multi-coloured dots, and the spinner was stuck on the ceiling. This was going to be disasterous for me, but at least everyone else would have fun...

"Glad you see it that way, Edward!" Wow. Sometimes, I'm suprised these thoughts even come to her in visions!

Then Emmett and Jasper ran into the room, followed by Rosalie. She took one look at me, then burst into laughter. I growled, and then was pleased that my growl actually came out properly.

"Stop it guys," Esme interrupted, coming into the room. Carlisle was right behind her.

Carlisle? He _knew_ about this? And he _allowed_ it to happen?

"You... _knew_?" I hissed, shocked.

"Yes, but I didn't think it would work," Carlisle smiled, pitying my bad luck. "Only you would be the one to prove me so wrong..."

I stifled a growl. Under no circumstances was I ever to growl at Carilisle, but my teeth crushed against one another anyways.

"You seem to be much better," Emmett interrupted, causing Rosalie to errupt in another fit of laughter.

I rolled my eyes and took a few steps towards them. But of course, I made a fool of myself and tripped over my own feet, landing flat on my face. The whole room echoed with their laughter, although Esme looked worried. She seemed to be debating over whether or not to help me up.

"I'm fine," I muttered.

"Well, seems like we're not going to have to wait for Bella to see the first clumsy vampire in history!" Emmett howled, causing the room to laugh again. I rolled my eyes, biting my lip to hold back a growl. Esme noticed the look on my drunken face, and quickly called the room to order.

"Alright, who wants to go first?" she called, easing the tension in the room.

"Well, Eddie..." Emmett whispered mischievously. Alice's eyes went blank.

"No Emmett, that's not a good idea, trust me. I will."

Emmett cussed under his breath, disappointed that his fun and games would have to wait. Alice skipped onto the "mat", hopped lightly, and flicked the arrowhead of the spinner. The little arrow flew around effortlessly, and eventually came to a stop on 'right hand - blue'. Alice flipped over, and balanced herself on her right hand in a one-handed handstand. That's when I remembered that our rules were changed. It looked like nothing _but _her hand was going to be touching the board -- maybe she saw that I didn't know, and wanted to show me?

"Fine, Edward's going now!" Emmett muttered, and I smiled and hopped up to the spinner like Alice, remembering to flick it gently. I landed as softly as I could on my feet, managing to keep most of my balance. That wasn't too bad... some of the vodka must of wore off when I puked.

The spinner landed on ' left foot - green' and I hopped onto it, ignoring Emmett's innuendo about how I wasn't "green" anymore. I balanced on my left foot, having almost no difficulty, but wobbling a bit. I couldn't imagine trying to do this while still human... although I don't think a human could get this drunk and _not _pass out.

"Okay, I'm going now!" Emmett bellowed, as Rosalie rolled her eyes. He hopped up to the spinner and spun it, a little too hard. Alice rolled her eyes as the spinner flew off and went flying to the other side of the room.

"I saw this," she muttered. "I just didn't think you would be that stupid! Esme, there's a new spinner on the table in the kitchen, grab it and stick it on. Now Emmett, the harder you spin it _doesn't _mean the better your spin will be! How old are you, 5?"

"Aww, Alice, stop! I just spun it too hard, that's all!" Emmett frowned, as everyone else chuckled. Esme returned with the spinner, and she stuck it back on in it's place. Emmett glared at Alice and spun it again. It didn't break off this time, and it landed on 'right knee - green'.

I sighed. Of course Alice would have jazzed up the game, it wouldn't be a challenge at all if it was just our hands and feet. Emmett grinned to me, and then slowly placed his knee two spaces from my foot. He grabbed his foot in the back, and then hung on to it. Alice was still upside down on her right hand, looking flawless. She probably would have been just as comfortable on her feet, though.

Everyone eventually took a turn except for Esme - she was going to control the spinner for us, so no one else would fight, and nothing else would be broken off.

20 minutes later, Emmett was sprawled against the mat in a star like position. His arms and legs were spaced out in a wide angle, although his knee was still on green, so it wasn't a perfect star. He was just attempting to keep up his torso.

Alice was upside down on one hand and her elbow, and her two feet were stuck to circles on different parts of the wall. She looked just as relaxed as she would have been if she was lying down on the couch.

Jasper was upside down, too. He was on both of his elbows, and his feet were spread wide to touch opposite ends of the wall. He was extremely relaxed, too.

Rosalie had both hands and both legs right next to one another on the board - she looked like she was in some kind of uncomfortable, stick-straight push-up position. Although, she didn't look uncomfortable at all, like Alice and Jasper.

Carlisle had his legs spread wide apart, almost in the splitz. His arms were in front of him, pushing against the wall. Once again, he looked fine.

Then there was me. I've been extremely lucky up until this point - I was simply standing, one leg next to the other, with my two hands on the wall. It was honestly the easiest thing I've ever done!

But, it was my turn to roll. Esme flicked the spinner, and it landed on 'left knee - red'.

Oh great. That's on the other side of the board! I slowly pushed my knee away until it was just touching the dot. Unfortunatly, I had to put my knee _underneath_ Emmett's broad torso.

Emmett smirked. "Not so easy now, is it little brother?" I glared back.

That was when I had decided that drunk or not, I _was _going to last longer than Emmett! Alice smirked, clearly getting another vision. I didn't bother to concentrate on it though; there was no way that I was going to let myself lose to Emmett just so that I could check on Alice's vision.

As the minutes ticked by, things got more and more difficult. It was gradually becoming obvious that it was a game between myself and Emmett. His burly body was making it extremely difficult for him to fit on each dot. On the other hand, I couldn't see straight. If I could sweat, now would be the time. I was concentrating so hard on trying to keep my balance as each turn progressed - standing on one leg, on one hand, on two hands, on my knee...

Finally, Emmett got a roll that would be almost impossible. 'Right elbow - green'.

He put his elbow to the ground, and so he was standing on two elbows. He huffed, and you could see the strain on his face. Then he got an idea.

"So Edward, today's the big day!"

Hmm. I guess it is... it was 6:00 in the morning. Bella...

"No, Emmett, don't..." Alice muttered.

All of my worries started flowing in and out of my head again... what if's... lightning? Car accident? I shook my head abruptly. I needed to concentrate.

"Poor Bella. I hope she's not too warm..." he muttered mischievously. "I hope she isn't worrying. It's a good thing Jacob's gone. I wonder if any of the other wolves want to see her? Hmm... I hope she doesn't trip going down the stairs, or hurt herself, just because you --"

He was cut off by my loud growl. I lept at him at the same time that he jumped out of the way. I tackled him, and tried to punch him in the face, missing as he dodged. Jasper lept up and pulled us apart, throwing me through the window and throwing Emmett out the door.

I landed about 20 feet from our house. I didn't bother to land swiftly on my feet; I just let myself tumble and then I laid down. All of the sudden, my stomach started feeling stangely queasy, again. Just like earlier in the bar -

I puked another pile of dark brownish blood. I then crawled away from it at a smooth human pace. I laid down on the soft grass, looking at the sparse clouds and the sun that was rising - a special day, for Forks.

My head felt strangely heavy, and my eyes felt like lead. I almost couldn't feel my fingertips or my toes. I closed my eyes and my head went strangely blank. I didn't move at all, although I couldn't feel my arms or legs anymore, anyways. I could still hear and smell everything and everyone around me - I was still aware of my surroundings. But I couldn't think about it. I knew that if I had to react to anything quickly, I could. I could barely open my eyes, yet I didn't even want to try. Nothing really mattered to me. I felt... peaceful.

Later on, I figured out that that is how a vampire feels when they pass out.

* * *

**AN - WOOHOO! End of chapter 2! It's been a long one, and I actually can't wait to get back to the actual story. I'm so happy that I'm done!**

**I have to warn you, the humor ends here. Almost... I took the time to jazz this up and to make it as funny as I could, even though some people don't like it, because I knew that this story was going to be very sad and depressing in Edward's perspective. I hoped you enjoyed my little humorous bachelor party, and I can't wait to continue with the actual story!!**

**PS - A last little repercussion of the bachelor party will be added with the next chapter, but don't worry, it's nothing too important.**

* * *

**SO, Chapter 2 so far has.... (insert drum-roll here)**

**22 REVIEWS !**

**Here's the reviewers that I didn't mention yet...**

**Thankyou **vandella **and **ForeverDreamingBeforeTheDawn (emmie) **!!!**

**and**twilighterazngurl**here's my reply... - thank you so much,, !!! I aimed for funny at that part (gay bar)... the book is so serious, i thought i should add some humor while i could... edward's perspectiveof some things later aren't exactly joyful. thanks for the idea !! it sparked a plug... the spray paint gave me a good idea... ;)**

twilighterazngurl, cinderpeltrocks08, angelplusbuffyequals4ever, Xxedward'sbellaxX, Chaos Pg, WeisseRose, MarMarLuvsTheTeddyBear, Anjaff **and **mrsedwardcullen73ca**!!!!**

**YAY, applause, happiness, ladedadedaaa !!!**

Narnia dreamer, supernaturalprincess73ca, ItSMeAmbeR, impeacheuan3122, TwilightgoddesslovesEdwardlol,

this_heart - **Thanks so much, and don't worry, I'll keep writing... but please keep reviewing!**

Anna - **Thanks for reviewing! And I agree. I hate stories that have Edward that's... not Edward. He is drunk here, though... but I do think I'm going to have to add some more of his personality as it continues. Don't worry, he won't do anything that he will regret... but he will be quite embarrassed at Emmett and Jasper's memories, muahaha :)**

Emi_Katie - **Thank you ! And he is going to stay 'sweet' while he's still drunk... but I'm going to try to make him Edward-y too. Thanks for the review!**

**And since I didn't reply to almost all of the above, here's my overall reply...**

* * *

**EDWARD. IS. DRUNK. It's kind of funny, I know!! A couple people think that Emmett and Jasper must pay... hahaha, I agree, but I don't know where to fit it in! And maybe vampires can't get drunk... there was a bit of controversy about that! But in order for everything to tie in well, I needed it to happen. And about EDWARD !  
I personally feel like a bit of a hypocrite because I absolutely DETEST when people change their personalities! But he _was_drunk... I did try to fit a bit of his personality in. You can see some of his conscience (no, not con-science, con-shince?) and you can also see how stubborn he was with the "pole dancing". He also followed around a brunette with brown eyes... sound familiar? You have to remember that he couldn't think, see, or walk straight...**

**I was also asked how I came up with it. It was mostly luck, really. First I thought about the hunting idea... but there's no way they would actually just do that for a _bachelor party._ And then I thought, what if he was drunk? He only drinks blood, so it would have to be _in _the blood. After a while, I came up with them drugging the deer & lion.  
I asked a friend what they should do for a bachelor party and she said that she didn't know, they should just be playing "Sweet Dreams are Made of This" because it's a good bachelor song. That's when I decided that they should go to a club, so the song could be playing. But, I unfortunately forgot to add it in, so I'll just be adding it to the next part of the bachelor party that I'm adding now, (which that same friend suggested a little while later).  
When he tripped over the "pretty lady's" bag, at first, he was just supposed to trip. Then I thought, why not over a bag? It was when they were about to go on the poles that I decided that she shouldn't just be a pretty lady...  
And about the pole dancing. I looked up bachelor party ideas on google and up popped a few. I accidently clicked on one that was for a bachelorette party, and "take pole dancing lessons" was there. I figured it would be funny, and so I decided to go with that as I went.**

**I agree -- anyone can have some fun with a drunk vampire :)**

**And yes, I am planning to "write write write write more", don't worry !**

**And I'm willing to bet that Bella would've have enjoyed it, too -- although he probably would've tried to get _her _on the pole, too !**

**And thanks to everybody that said that they loved my story! I have to admit, I do have a favorite review... thank you, **WeisseRose **!!! Your review really meant alot... **

**As good as Stephenie Meyer? Ahh, shucks, although I doubt that. But it's always a good thing to be called as good as my favorite author of all time! And I decided to write Breaking Dawn in Edward's perspective because I thought it would be very interesting, too. Also, I do not want to write about a sad suicidal vampire (New Moon) and I don't currently have Eclipse here...  
And when I said "dead hand", I thought it was something very Edward-like, too. He does (or at least, did, in Midnight Sun) hate himself for everything he's doing to Bella.  
And ahahaha, I got weak when I read the whole 'realistic' thing... haha.  
- Martha :)**

**So, thanks to everyone, and I hope you enjoy the last part of the bachelor party (suggested by -- **twilighterazngurl**, and a good friend :D)**** !!!**


	3. Big Day

**Disclaimer!**

**_Stephenie Meyer (in raspy/sick voice) - I've officially given you Breaking Dawn in my will._**

**_Me - So does that mean that I have the rights to Breaking Dawn now?_**

**_Disclaimer - Yes._**

**Me **wakes up** - WOW, do I actually have the rights to Breaking Dawn ?**

**Disclaimer - Haha, you wish. NO.**

* * *

"Edward! I know you can hear me," Alice shrilled. "And you are _leaving._ Get up, _now_!"

Yes, Alice was right. I could hear her… very clearly. But I didn't think about it at all. I stayed out of her head, and mine, and continued to lay in my peaceful trance. This was a once in a lifetime opportunity – there was no way that I was getting drunk again, just to relive this peace.

"He doesn't plan on getting up, so you're going to have to lift him into the back of the Jeep," Alice sighed.

Oh, great. I'm leaving – Alice didn't want me here for the wedding preparations. I stayed in my peaceful slumber, convincing myself thoughtlessly that this peace would be worth Emmett throwing me in the back of his truck and driving like a madman.

"Hey buddy. Apparently you can hear me, so I would just like to warn you that this will be a _very _bumpy ride," he chuckled. He then flung my limp body over his shoulder.

"Woah, are you sure we didn't hurt him? He's not even… moving," Jasper said cautiously. "Is he okay?"

"Of course he's okay!" Alice interrupted. "Just. Get. Him. OUT! I have to go get her! _NOW!"_

I dismissed Alice's remarks easily, and even ignored Emmett as he threw me into the back of his truck. I went back to my ignorant stupor, and ignored all of the sounds coming from around me.

When the truck finally stopped, I had no idea how long we had been driving. We could have gone all the way to the other side of the world, or even just down the street. I may have been aware of all sounds around me, but I ignored them easily.

Unfortunately, I was beginning to fall out of my stupor. I could hear bare traces of Jasper's thoughts – he was still worried, even though he could feel my emotions. Emmett's self-centered and occasionally disturbing thoughts weren't any different than they usually were as he hopped out of the truck. He pretended to crack his knuckles and walked up to me, planning on throwing me out of the truck and miles away.

_Haha, he'll never see this coming. I wonder if he'll be able to feel anything… he better. It would ruin all of the fun if he couldn't!_

Emmett had no idea that I was no longer 'passed out', so I stayed in my statue-still position as he reached his hand to grab my arm.

I flew up from his truck and landed on the ground behind him. He was so startled that he didn't even realize that I was following through with his plan – just the other way around.

I chuckled to myself as Emmett flew across the trees, then grabbed the top of one and used it to slingshot his way back. Jasper laughed as well, but he was also relieved.

_So, is it all worn off now? You seem fine, nothing like you were last night._

He then demonstrated scenes from a familiar looking bar and me playing Twister – both extremely embarrassing.

That wasn't the worst part though… I couldn't remember a thing.

Jasper looked into my face and felt my emotions in the air. His mouth then dropped open.

"No way. _No way. _You've got to be kidding me," he mumbled, clearly in awe.

"What?" Emmett questioned. Then he turned to me. "Nice throw, man, glad to see that you can stand on your own two feet again."

_Actually, I'm not. That was one of the funniest nights of my life… Now what was Jasper talking about?_

"Jazz?" Emmett questioned, confused. Jasper grinned in reply.

"Well, it seems like our little _buddy _here has _no idea_ what went on last night."

I gritted my teeth. What the hell did they make me do? _Why can't I remember? _I know that we went hunting…

Then Emmett and Jasper's bemused memories then filled me in on the rest of the night.

I… was _drunk? _I went to a _club? _I danced with… _that? _On a _pole?!_ I made a fool out of myself… _and _I almost exposed the secret, again. I puked? Great, that probably means that—Yes, I'm thirsty. My throat burned and I felt extremely empty. But I ignored the burning sensation and refocused on their thoughts…

Then we left… I babbled about nonsense… and we came home to play… Twister? Great, I tripped; of course I did! I _had _to make even more of a fool of myself. Then I watched as I struggled to beat Emmett, trembling with each move. Who won?

Then Emmett remembered the outcome of the rest of the night. When he heard my low growl, he struggled to stop thinking about it. Jasper, on the other hand, replayed each word and emotion that Emmett and I felt and spoke. He chuckled as he remembered me tackling Emmett. I then watched as he threw us both out of the house, and the next day, when Emmett biffed my lifeless body into the back of his truck.

My fists clenched and unclenched. My teeth gritted. I snarled and growled, looking furiously at Emmett, and then Jasper. He might have been sympathetic, but from what I remembered and just listened to, he played a _huge _part in this.

"_Emmett? _Did you _actually _get me drunk, and plan to _get away with it?"_ I snarled.

"Hey man, it was your bachelor party, and you had fun. Now just forget about it, we have stuff to do!" For once, Emmett made sense. Although I made a complete idiot out of myself, it's what a bachelor party was for. Have fun, get ready for your life ahead of you, and say goodbye to the single days of the past.

I shiver went up my spine as I thought about Bella. She's going to be _mine._ I get to marry her and have her in my life forever, although some obstacles may get in the way...

Another shiver went up my spine, although it wasn't happy like the first. I was a bundle of nerves. If I were human, my heart would be pounding, my hands would be clammy, my head would be heated, and I probably wouldn't be able to breathe. I tried to inhale, and nothing happened -- the thoughts going through my head were too nerve-wracking.

How can she make me do this to her? Anything but this. She's going to get hurt...

And it'll be _all my fault._

I mentally slapped myself in the head. There's no need to worry about the honeymoon now, we're not even married yet!

"Um, Edward? Alice said that you would be thirsty, and she's going to kill us if we don't get you back there in time. You should hurry..." Jasper mumbled.

I shook my head, and then started to take off into the woods. Then a very unsettling thought crossed my mind.

"Emmett, you did _not_ intoxicate these deer, too, did you?" I growled.

_No! No, I swear. Alice would kill me!_

That was enough to assure me, although I made sure to check each deer thoroughly as I hunted. I took my time, pausing by a brook and looking across the steady water after I had already drained three deer. This world is so beautiful... I feel so lucky to be a part of it, even though I shouldn't be. I feel like I wreak havoc with every step that I take, with every breath that I breathe.

I sighed, and then ran. I ran through the forests and trees, pushing my agile legs with every step. The exhilaration was both comforting and calming -- this was the one thing that I could do, and not get wrong. I knew that I had to leave, though, so I turned and ran back to the Jeep.

_Come on, we should leave, _Jasper thought. _It's already 12:30._

He didn't need to 'say' anymore. I flung myself into the back of his truck eagerly, desperate to see Bella.

"You know you can't see her until the wedding, right? Alice will kill you!" Emmett laughed.

I nodded my head. Yes, I knew that perfectly well. I could not wait to see her beautiful face again, and her huge eyes... they were the way that I saw straight through her, the way that I read some of her thoughts. And then there was her beautiful crimson cheeks. I would probably see her flush red today; I cannot imagine Bella being in front of such a crowd and not finding something to blush about.

Emmett finally swerved into our driveway and pulled into our large garage. He parked against the long line of cars, where Rosalie was standing expectantly.

"You're back," she muttered.

_I wonder... is he really back? Did it wear off when he passed out?_

I sighed, and nodded. Then I noticed my Volvo... my precious car... was...

They painted it _pink._

I growled ferociously. I didn't have time for this! "Rose, please tell me that you will fix my car, or I will personally kill your husband."

She rolled her eyes and nodded, glaring at Emmett."Ugh, fine, I'll do it while you're gone. But I just wanted to warn you not to go upstairs, or near Alice. She'll be _furious_," she continued.

I thanked her as we walked to the living room. I was very careful to concentrate on anyone's thoughts but my own, blocking them out with the best of my ability.

"Hello boys, Rose," Esme smiled, slipping into the room. "Would you do me a favor and help me finish things up out back?"

We all agreed, and I was thankful that I wouldn't have to concentrate so hard. Rosalie left to help out Alice.

We finished off all of the lights and decorations slowly, and I was careful to take my time. I could still hear everything that was going on upstairs, and I was careful not to listen to their thoughts. Jasper eventually left to pick up Renée and Phil. Soon Rosalie left, as well. I was relieved when Alice told Bella that she had to leave to get dressed.

Alice darted into the yard, motioning for me to hurry up.

"Alright, it's time for you to get dressed, come on!" She ran back into the house and went upstairs.

I followed quickly, eager to get ready and see Bella again.

"Don't even think about it," she hissed under her breath. "Now I have to get dressed and run back to Bella. I'm sure you can put a tuxedo on by yourself..." she rolled her eyes and skipped up the stairs.

I walked into my room, careful not to think about what Alice was doing as she skipped back to Bella. I pulled on my tuxedo at human speed, careful to think about everything I was doing.

I'm going to marry Isabella Swan... Bella will be my wife. Isabella Swan... Bella Cullen.

I can remember being jealous every time she spoke to Mike, Tyler or Eric, back before she knew I was a vampire. I thought about how she would end up with someone like them for the rest of her life, because I could never be good enough for her. She still deserves that...

I ended up 'winning', in the end. Mike is just her friend, if you could call it that. She doesn't even talk to Tyler or Eric anymore. And Jacob is long gone...

I winced as I remembered the look of pain on Bella's face that appears every time she sees something that reminds her of Jacob. She's so worried about him... she thinks that this is all her fault.

The stupid _dog _left of his own accord, there's no reason for her to feel bad about it. But she doesn't listen to me any time that I try to tell her that, she just sits and lets me comfort her.

I sighed and glanced at the clock on my carpeted wall. 3:15... only 15 more minutes until the wedding. I took a deep breath, and looked at myself in the mirror.

I remembered when Bella first thought that we couldn't cast a reflection with a chuckle. She wasn't sure if we would appear in photos...

That was before I left her. Those months without her were dark and desperate, the most horrible time in my life. I blocked myself from the world, trying to forget about her, being unsuccessful. Worrying about her all of the time...

There will be no need to worry about her now -- she'll be with me for the rest of our lives. I turned from the mirror and walked into the hallway. Emmett was already there. I kept myself focused on everything that my best man said. As mischievous as he was sometimes, he made my life all the better. He made it fun and supported me in my decisions... I can only thank him for that.

"You ready?" he muttered. I looked to him and smiled, taking a deep breath.

"I couldn't be any more prepared."

He grinned back, and we waited by the stairs.

Our grand entrance was quick and effortless. Most of the human faces were breathless as we entered, and I smiled at the Denali clan. I was thankful that they were there, especially with wolves here. Seth was standing, beaming. He was one of the only 'werewolves' I knew that I could consider a true friend, and I was grateful to have him here.

I stopped at the altar, turning, waiting for Bella impatiently. Alice waltzed down the stairs, smiling to the crowd. She looked pretty in her silver dress, but it was nothing compared to how Bella looked when she came through the doors.

She was beautiful, as always. She took my breath away. Her dress fitted easily over her slender curves, and her dark hair was a beautiful contrast to the snowy-white veil. Her face was bright and shocked as she looked at the decorations and the crowd, the beiges, pinks and browns Alice chose for her complexion smoothed over her features, making them look an innocent creamy peach -- it was beautiful next to her slowly flushing cheeks. The dark make-up brought out her beautiful chocolate eyes, and made them tell more of a story then they ever did.

She looked towards me and I was breathless. She looked awed, and I couldn't help but smile in exultation as she slowly came closer. Her brow furrowed the tiniest bit, and her hold on Charlie's arm tightened -- I was guessing that she was almost as eager as I was. At last, Charlie placed her warm hand into my own. I was very careful not to let him touch my icy skin -- he would be even more frightened then he should be after comparing Bella's skin to my own.

She was finally here, her delicate hand in my own, waiting to speak the words to make her my own forever. I wasn't paying much attention to Mr. Weber as he read our vows, I could only see Bella's face as silent tears streaked down her cheeks. I saw a look of realization dawn over her face, and as always, I was curious to hear what she was thinking about. Then it was her turn to say the words...

"I do," she whispered, blinking her eyes and looking into my own.

Then it was my turn to speak. "I do."

We were declared husband and wife, and I cradled her delicate face in my hands. Bella was _mine_, after these past two amazing years, and we were going to spend the rest of our lives together. I smiled at her, watching the tears spill from her brown eyes. Tears of joy -- tears I would have had if I were not an immortal. I bent my head to her own, and she stood as tall as she could, throwing her arms around my neck and showing as much enthusiasm as always.

I then kissed her soft, human lips as tenderly as I possibly could. I went to pull back, but she didn't want it to end. So I pushed her soft face away from my own, much to her disappointment. I didn't like ending the kiss either -- but the audience didn't appreciate it very much. I almost laughed at the look on her face, but I restrained myself, trying to be as gentlemanly as possible, and just smirked.

The crowd broke into applause, and we turned to face our friends and family. She never took her eyes off of my own, and we were only separated when loving mother wrapped her arms around my Bella. We were then passed through the crowd, and I was careful not to touch any human's skin as we moved by. I felt the embraces of the Denali clan and my family, their own skin warm against my own. Then I received a scorching, almost fire-hot hug from young Seth Clearwater, the only werewolf brave enough to stand amongst us vampires.

He was not only a good companion, with a mind more innocent than almost anyone else's that I have ever heard, but he was also a real, true friend.

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**AN - So that's ALL of chapter 3! Definitely not as long as the last - as you can see, I'm keeping to the chapters of the book, and it didn't have nearly as many details about the bachelor party.**

**I would like to thank all of you for the wonderful reviews, and some of you even reviewed my other fanfic (it's new :D), '100 Things That Emmett Cullen Should Never Do!'. It's kindof humorous, and I'm sure that most of you would like it :) Check it out if you're waiting for the next chapter!**

**Oh, and I also fixed the 'Esme's gone shopping/Esme's listening to the piano?!' mix-up at the end of chapter 1.**

**Chapter 4 should be up soon, and remember, it's your reviews that keep me going!**


	4. Gesture

**Disclaimer - Nothing special... I just don't own Stephenie Meyer's characters... or her storyline...**

* * *

Angels on the Moon

GESTURE

Thanks to Alice, the reception party started immediately after the wedding, beginning at twilight – just in time so we could be outside without worrying about the sun. The timing was perfect, and the decorations were all beautiful; twinkling lights; a breezy tent; more priceless flowers… I assumed by the look on Bella's face that the aroma was breathtaking.

Then I heard something in the forest; the soft, rhythmic padding of oversized paws coming closer. I strained my neck and looked across the crowd to find Seth, and when he caught my gaze, he nodded and ducked out the door – he must have heard it, too. He returned with a huge smile on his face.

_Jacob's coming back! He'll be here soon… I think before the dance is over._

The crowd began to relax as the night went on. Friends and family came to greet us, and we embraced, talked, and laughed.

"Congrats, guys," Seth Clearwater told us with a smile. His mother, Sue, was almost glued to his side, her eyes darting from guest to guest. Her thoughts were very worried – but she still had faith in Seth, and she almost believed that he was doing the right thing. Billy Black was on Seth's other side, his face was bright and happy, and all his thoughts were centered on the fact that his son was coming home … Seth had told him, almost immediately after he found out himself. As he looked in my direction, he began to think about the ancient treaty. He, too, knew that a breach would come soon, and that Bella had already made her choice.

_Don't hurt her. Her life is in your hands now._

I tried to smile in reassurance, but my thoughts kept going back to the honeymoon, and the choices Bella had made. If only I had never met her… But then I would never feel this way. The past is the past. I can only focus on her future, and keeping her safe.

Then Seth leaned forward, and I happily embraced him with my free arm. I almost shuddered when his hot skin pressed against my arm – the two opposite temperatures almost made me uncomfortable. But the friendship that we had made me smile, and Bella smiled too, I could almost hear her thinking about how she was right, the two species could co-exist.

"It's good to see things work out for you, man," Seth said. "I'm happy for you."

"Thank you, Seth. That means a lot to me." And it really did. Their presence made Bella so much happier, and Billy and Sue must not have felt comfortable with it… "Thank you, as well. For letting Seth come. For supporting Bella today."

"You're welcome," Billy said, his thoughts once again centered on the return of his son.

Seth then waved goodbye, and they left, letting the slowly forming line move on. Angela and Ben were next, followed by Angela's parents and then Mike and Jessica. Jessica's thoughts were centered on Mike, which disgusted me, and Mike's thoughts were centered on Bella, which disgusted me even more. Behind them was the Denali clan – Tanya was first, and she swiftly embraced me, sighing.

"Ah, Edward," she said. "I've missed you." _Are you positive about this? _

I chuckled, ignoring her question, and pulling away. She knew very well how I felt about Bella. "It's been too long, Tanya. You look well."

"So do you." _I'll take that as a no… oh well._

I almost rolled my eyes, and once again ignored her. "Let me introduce you to my wife." Bella smiled as I said the words, and my chest felt light – I finally had staked my claim to her. She was mine, completely, entirely, forever… mine. "Tanya, this is my Bella."

Tanya's eyes curiously raked over Bella. _She will make a beautiful mate, Edward. You know how I feel, but I can't help but be happy for you. _I ignored the beautiful statement – Bella was already stunning – as she took her hand.

"Welcome to the family, Bella," Tanya said warmly. "We consider ourselves Carlisle's extended family, and I _am _sorry about the, er, recent incident when we did not behave as such. We should have met you sooner. Can you forgive us?"

"Of course," Bella whispered, breathless. "It's so nice to meet you."

Tanya smiled, and turned to her sister. "The Cullens are all evened up in numbers now. Perhaps it will be our turn next, eh, Kate?"

"Keep the dream alive," Kate muttered, rolling her eyes. She then turned to Bella, and squeezed her hand gently. "Welcome, Bella."

Carmen placed her hand on top of Kate's, and smiled. "I'm Carmen, and this is Eleazar. We're all so very pleased to finally meet you."

"M-me, too," Bella stuttered. I chuckled, too low for her to hear.

_Good luck with her Edward. She'll be fine, you'll be fine – _their thoughts all echoed the same thing. I sighed, ignoring their reassurances.

"We'll get to know each other later," Tanya grinned. "We'll have _eons _of time for that!" Then they all laughed, and moved on.

As the night progressed, the standard traditions were kept, much to my amusement. The only part I disliked was the eating of the cake – I didn't want to think about how I would have to dispose of it later. By the time the first dance began, Bella no longer seemed tense or worried, she seemed to be having an excellent time. Having her in my arms again calmed me down, as well… but I still couldn't stop the thoughts that echoed in the corner of my head, telling me about how tonight was a bad idea, it's too dangerous. They were just an echo, though – a separate part of my mind, worrying about separate things. It was too late to convince Bella of anything now. We just got married… she's mine.

I beamed at the beautiful brunette in my arms; she was so happy. It calmed me entirely, as always. Bella was happy, so I was happy.

I slowly leaned down to whisper in her ear, enjoying the moment. "Enjoying the party, Mrs. Cullen?

She laughed. "That will take a while to get used to."

Her happiness flowed through me. "We have a while." I leaned down to kiss her, softly, but sweetly. The feeling of her lips on mine affected me as they always did – the background faded away, all I could feel was her. I barely even noticed the cameras clicking away, capturing the moment.

Then Charlie danced with her, and I danced with Esme. Her thoughts were all joyous, and all she was focusing on was my happiness. Then I danced with my sisters, and even Renee.

_Why she wants that horrific, disgusting idiot, I won't ever know. But she's in my arms now, now that… thing. I wish I could kill him. He deserves it. Bella should be mine. I have her, she is mine. I could take her away right now. She's so beautiful tonight… he doesn't deserve this. I could've been the one standing next to this. Her soft lashes, her creamy skin. And, the way it feels under my hands…_

Mike Newton's thoughts continued in a very disgusting way. I quickly whirled over to Bella, pulling her from his arms as swiftly as I could.

"Still not that fond of Mike, eh?" She commented.

"Not when I have to listen to his thoughts. He's lucky that I didn't kick him out. Or worse."

"Yeah, right."

"Have you had a chance to look at yourself?"

"Um. No, I guess not. Why?"

I was briefly shocked. Alice… "Then I suppose you don't realize how utterly, heart-breakingly beautiful you are tonight. I'm not surprised Mike's having difficulty with improper thoughts about a married woman. I _am_ disappointed that Alice didn't make sure you were forced to look in a mirror."

"You are very biased, you know."

I sighed. When will she ever see herself clearly? I turned to her around to face the house, her reflection off the glass showing her exactly how beautiful she really looked. "Biased, am I?"

I smiled as she gasped, looking at herself in awe. I was about to tell her that it didn't make a difference, she was always beautiful, when I heard my name called out, awkwardly.

_Um… Edward? I'm here._

"Oh!" I said, surprised. Bella looked up to me curiously, and I smiled.

"What is it?" she asked.

"A surprise wedding gift."

"Huh?"

I didn't bother answering; I just twirled her out the door to where he was waiting in the shadows. I stopped, looking up to his form, deep in the trees.

"Thank you," I said to his tall form. "This is very kind of you."

"Kind is my middle name." He walked towards Bella. "Can I cut in?"

"Jacob!" Bella choked out. "Jacob!"

"Hey there Bells," he grinned.

"Rosalie will never forgive me if she doesn't get her official turn on the dance floor," I lied, knowing very well that I had already danced with her. Instead, I disappeared far into the trees, taking the time to cough up the cake I ate earlier. I then sat on a rock, and waited, thinking about Bella, and trying to give her enough time to be with Jacob.

_WHAT?!_

The thought was louder than if he had screeched it into the darkness. I knew that he was angry from the sound of his voice, and I flew into the darkness towards them, needing to get to Bella.

"Ow, Jake! Let go!"

Fury erupted into my system. He was _hurting _her. I sprinted making it into the small space.

"Take your hands off her," I said, growling, ready to rip his head off. Seth had heard the argument too, and he joined us in the small space.

"Jake, bro, back away," he urged. "You're losing it."

_You'll kill her._

He didn't move.

"You'll hurt her," Seth whispered. "Let her go."

_You'll kill her!_

He didn't move.

"Now!" I snarled.

Jacob's hands dropped, and I pulled Bella into my arms and away from him quickly.

"C'mon, Jake. Let's go," Seth pleaded, putting his arms around Jacob's body.

_NO! Bella! She'll die! NO!_

"I'll kill you," he whisped, focusing on me. "I'll kill you myself! I'll do it now!" His body trembled, and I kept my grip on Bella, ready to fly with her to safety at a seconds notice.

Sam growled sharply. _Stop! Jacob! Seth will get hurt!_

But Jacob couldn't stop, and neither could hear Sam's warnings.

"Seth, get out of the way," I hissed. But, naturally, he didn't.

"Don't do it, Jake. Walk away. C'mon."

Sam realized that his pleas wouldn't help, and so he began to push Jacob out of the way, along with Seth. After what seemed like hours, the unnoticed struggle was over, and Bella was safe.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, her voice cracking.

"It's all right now, Bella," I tried to sooth her, wanting to erase the pain… none of this was her fault, it never is.

_You better keep her safe, bloodsucker. As much as I want to go after you right now, no one wants a war. Protect her…_

I stared into the wolf's cold, dark eyes. He was sincere, even with the red hate tingeing his thoughts. I nodded, trying to convince him that she was safe; with me… she's always safe…

I looked away from him as realization struck me. This entire fight – Bella being in danger – was because of me and my future decisions. About… me not keeping her safe. Everything I've been trying to convince myself and everyone around me was untrue. The chances of Bella…

"All right," I said to myself, trying to shake the thoughts away. "Let's get back."

"But Jake––"

"Sam has him in hand. He's gone."

"Edward, I'm so sorry. I was stupid––"

"You did nothing wrong––"

"I have such a big mouth! Why would I… I shouldn't have let him get to me like that. What was I thinking?"

She didn't understand… none of this is ever her fault! "Don't worry." My fingers slipped across her pale skin, and the warmth momentarily calmed me down, helping me to think reasonably. "We need to get back to the reception before someone notices our absence."

She slowly shook her head in disbelief, then decided that it was time to return. "Give me two seconds," she whispered. She took a few deep breaths, and smoothed out the lines on the poufy skirt. "My dress?"

"You look fine. Not a hair out of place."

After a few more deep breaths, we made our back into the crowd, spinning like nothing had happened.

_Is everything okay? It sounded pretty tense out there… Emmett was about two seconds away from going after you._

Pulling my lips into a grim smile, I nodded, then turned to Bella. "Are you––"

"I'm fine," she mumbled, rolling her eyes. "I can't believe I did that. What's wrong with me?"

Any other day I would've snorted at her bizarre assumption. "Nothing is wrong with _you_."

Her lower lip trembled, and I could see the emotions through her deep eyes; embarrassment, regret, sadness, and then, a small, tiny bit of confidence.

"It's over," she sighed. "Let's not think of it again tonight."

She said that like it was possible. The thoughts and worries that had been running through my mind for weeks had multiplied immensely with all of the day's stress. Bella… tonight… the wolves… death… what am I… how can I?

"Edward?" she said, worried.

"Jacob is right," I whispered, talking to myself as much as her. "What _am_ I thinking?"

"He is not." Her face was fierce; determined. "Jacob is way too prejudiced to see anything clearly."

I ignored her, letting the thoughts run through my mind, closing my eyes whispering to myself. "She will not be all right. This is all my fault… it always is, all because of my selfishness. I _should_ let him kill me for even thinking…"

"Stop it," she hissed, interrupting my self-inflicted accusations. Her silky hands gently fell onto my cheekbones, calming me slowly. I took a breath, and opened my eyes, not wanting to worry her any longer. "You and me. That's the only thing that matters. The only thing you're aloud to think about now. Do you hear me?"

"Yes." If only it were that simple. But I would try, as always, for her.

"Forget Jacob came." Impossible. "For me. Promise that you'll let this go."

I looked into her eyes. How can she want me to forget about this? About her safety, about the things that are almost protecting her from the monster that I am. But…

I sighed. "I promise."

"Thank you. Edward, I'm not afraid."

"I am," I whispered. How could I not be? Her gentle, fragile life has been placed in my hands, and there's only so many things I can do to stop it from cracking, breaking into pieces.

"Don't be afraid." She smiled, taking a deep breath. "By the way, I love you."

Her words made me smile just enough to make her believe I was fine. "That's why we're here."

_My turn, brotha. _"You're monopolizing the bride," Emmett laughed, tugging me backwards. "Let me dance with my little sister. This could be my last chance to make her blush." _Plus, Jasper says you need a break. Seriously, it's not the end of the world._

The night continued on, my thoughts in a daze until Bella was back in my arms.

"I could get used to this," she grinned.

I chuckled. "Don't tell me you've gotten over your dancing issues?"

"Dancing isn't so bad – with you. But I was thinking more of this," she smiled mischievously, pulling me closer to her. "Of never having to let you go."

"Never," I answered honestly, and I slowly leant in and kissed her smooth, warm lips. The kiss was serious, the warmth slowly spreading, building ––

"Bella! It's time!" Alice's voice trilled. I ignored her, pulling Bella closer into my arms, urgently. I was no longer worried about her increase in heartbeat – it was part of the pattern now.

"Do you want to miss your plane? I'm sure you'll have a lovely honeymoon camped out in the airport waiting for another flight." _Edward! Come ON._

I would never make Bella do that. "Go away, Alice," I muttered, turning my face slightly and then pressing my lips to hers once again.

_Edward…_

"Bella, do you want to wear that dress on the airplane?" She was once again ignored, causing her to growl quietly. "I'll tell her where you're taking her, Edward. So help me, I will."

I froze. She wouldn't dare. But still… it wasn't something I wanted Bella to know, she needed the full effect. "You're awfully small to be so hugely irritating."

_Ha. I know!_

She rolled her eyes, happy to have gained our attention. "I didn't pick out the perfect going-away dress to have it wasted." Her slim hand wrapped around Bella's. "Come with me, Bella."

But Bella had no intention of doing so. Her neck strained, her lips brushing mine for one last time before Alice had pulled her away.

I smiled, chuckling along with our small audience.

Then Bella returned, and after a few goodbyes, we stepped out onto the front steps, and I kissed her on the doorstep, following tradition. Then we tucked into the car – I didn't ignore the rice pelting my back from Emmett, who was greatly enjoying the chance to annoy me – and we tucked into the car. We were finally driving away, and I turned to look into her soft eyes. "I love you."

"That's why we're here," she smirked.

I kissed her hair, and ignored the agonized howls echoing from the woods as we finally departed.

* * *

**AN - I know you all hate me now, I don't expect many reviews, but that would be nice : )**

**Sorry it took so long! I really am! It must be close to a year now since the last time I updated... oh well. I am almost done the next chapter, I have about 10 pages left, if that makes you feel better. The only problem is, I currently have little to none when it comes to access to the computer, so it's written out, not typed up. I might have it in a week. I'll attempt to update every week, preferably on weekends if possible. Don't worry, I'm not quitting this story, it's just... gotten a little boring.**

**It kindof has... gotten boring. Because I've written a few of my own stories now, well, one, and I started another. I hope you guys can't see the change in my writing. I think there's less of a change in the next chapter, so please, just review, tell me what you think, and the fic will only get better!**

**Review please : )**


	5. Isle Esme

**Disclaimer – Guess what? These characters aren't mine. Neither is the storyline… original, eh?**

Angels on the Moon

ISLE ESME

"Houston?" Bella questioned, raising her eyebrows as we reached the gate.

"Just a stop along the way," I grinned, enjoying my secret.

The plane had barely even taken off, and Bella was asleep. The ride seemed short with her head on my shoulder; her soft hair cascading onto my chest. She blinked groggily as I woke her up, pulling her onto the next plane.

"Rio de Janeiro?" she asked again, curious.

"Another stop," I muttered.

The flight again passed quickly, and before long, we were out of the plane and into a taxi, slowly driving towards the docks. I slipped my hand around hers, smiling as we drove along and her head slowly drooped again. I half-carried her out of the taxi, gently placing her on the ground so I could pay the driver and grab our luggage.

We reached the boat, and the speed was luxurious. It was nothing like running, of course, but the adrenaline rush was undeniable. I steered the boat with certainty, knowing exactly where to go without having to think twice.

"Are we going much farther?" Bella questioned uncomfortably, interrupting my carefree thoughts.

I turned to look at her, her eyes staring into mine with curiosity and her fists clenched tightly against the seat. "About another half hour," I laughed.

I turned my head back to the water, and before long, I could see the island coming into view.

"Bella, look there." I focused my eyes on her and studied her reactions as I pointed towards the island. First, confusion… her eyes couldn't see that far. And then some curiosity that had been haunting her eyes all night as she saw the shape, but then couldn't figure it out. And then, they held realization and shock.

"Where are we?" she murmured.

"This is Isle Esme," I smiled.

"Isle _Esme_?" she questioned, in shock.

I laughed. "A gift from Carlisle – Esme offered to let us borrow it."

I stopped the boat, grabbing the bags and tossing them into the dock. Then I pulled Bella into my arms.

"Aren't you supposed to wait for the threshold?" she muttered, rolling her eyes.

I grinned again, kissing the top of her nose. "I'm nothing if not thorough." I grabbed her bag in one hand, leaving the rest, and cradled her in my other arm.

I studied every expression on her pale face as she once again took in everything. Her cheeks glowed in the moonlight. As we continued up the path, the gentle rays reflecting of the moon combined with the soft lights shining from the house, casting purple-orange shadows on her skin. I inhaled softly in exasperation.

Her sudden increase in heartbeat drew my attention back to her eyes, which looked stubbornly in the other direction. I opened my mouth to ask what was wrong, when a sudden fear started creeping through my body. I almost froze where I was standing.

She was nervous. I was nervous. This could end so, so badly. But… that was the same fear that had been on my mind since the compromise. This… this felt different, entirely strange and new to me. The fact that Bella could get hurt was pushed to the side of my mind – not forgotten, of course, it was never forgotten – I was about to lose my virginity. But that didn't scare me as much as the fact that I had no idea what I was supposed to do. Of course, I knew the medical and basic concepts… but I couldn't help but think… what if I wasn't good enough? Human enough?

I stepped onto the porch, setting the bags down and looking towards her, waiting for her to shift her eyes and meet my gaze.

The sudden warmth of her brown eyes looking deep into my frozen ones made me almost forget – never completely – my worries and take her across the threshold, filling my duties as her husband. I then took her through the house, the pale colors making me feel at home. I stopped at the last bedroom – our bedroom – turned on the light, and carried her in. I put her down as softly as I could.

"I'll… go get the luggage," I whispered.

I sprinted to the door, taking one quick, calming breath of the natural, tropical air before grabbing the bags and racing back to the room. As soon as I returned, I noticed a small bead of sweat dripping down Bella's neck. I brushed my hand across it slowly, not wanting her in any discomfort.

"It's a little hot her," I said apologetically, almost regretting my decision. "I thought… that would be best."

"Thorough," she murmered.

I chuckled, then swallowed slowly, not knowing what to do with these emotions I wasn't used to feeling.

"I tried to think of everything that would make this… easier," I admitted softly.

She swallowed loudly, which almost calmed me down as I realized that my reactions were, indeed, human. But I was still far too nervous, and I could tell that she was, too.

"I was wondering," I said slowly, "if… first… maybe you'd like to take a midnight swim with me?" I took a deep breath. Water… cool, relaxing water… that should do the trick. "The water will be very warm. This is the kind of beach you'd approve of."

"Sounds nice," she breathed, her voice breaking.

I ignored it. "I'm sure you'd like a human minute or two…. It was a long journey."

She nodded, but the action was stiff, robot-like. I leaned in, urging to comfort her, and brushed my lips against her throat. She needed humor… I chuckled once, almost sounding fake. "Don't take _too _long Mrs. Cullen."

She jumped a little, and I almost felt true humor.

"I'll wait for you in the water," I whispered, brushing my lips down to the tip of her shoulder. I then turned and walked through the French doors, out onto the sand, dropping my shirt as I left. As I reached the beach it only took one swift movement and the rest of my clothes were lying on the sand, beneath the crooked palm tree. I took each into the water slowly, feeling the liquid shape itself against my stone-cold limbs and analyzing how each drop of water splashed and settled against my skin before taking another step. When the water was up to my waist, I released all the air in my lungs and fell backwards into the water, sinking to the bottom like a rock.

Because that's what I am. A rock. A rock and – even though my feeble consciousness had warned me over and over again – I was still about to take this innocent girl's life into my hands. Not only into my hands, but on the tip of my little finger, balancing her precious soul and every dream on almost nothing. Just one wrong movement, even a simple twitch, and she would fall. Break. Two lives, one innocent and pure, one demonic and cold, shattered.

Even if I managed to keep my strength under control, what if I bit her? I could not, absolutely _NOT_ take away these last few weeks of her life. Anything can happen in a day. Anything…

And then there were my more selfish worries, which had surfaced earlier. I was a monster… unhuman. What if I wasn't as in touch with my human instincts as my siblings? Although Carlisle had assured me not to worry, how could I be sure? What if I was all wrong… not enough?

And then, as much as I was trying to suppress it, there was a tingling excitement that I had never felt before. I assumed it was some form of male hormones, and I shivered in disgust. Although, it was the most pleasant feeling…

I pushed myself up and out of the water, taking a gulp of fresh air as any human would have done. I felt more at ease with all of my senses back. I placed my hands against the water, feeling the rippling waves and then looking up to the moon. The soft grey crevices highlighted its imperfections, but also its uniqueness. Its loneliness… it did look pretty lonely.

Bella's soft footsteps padded across the sand. I closed my eyes, imagining what she'd look like as she took each one. She paused – I heard a light fabric fall to the ground… her towel? – and then she continued. She passed through the water, walking slowly and hesitantly, until she was at my side. She placed her hand on top of mine, and I opened my eyes.

"Beautiful," she said, her voice soft, hanging in the air.

"It's all right," I responded. It had nothing on her beauty. I turned slowly to face her, her delicate face, and my eyes met hers, the chocolate-brown looking almost black. I twisted my hand to twine our fingers together, pulling her hand beneath the surface. "But I wouldn't use the word _beautiful_," I continued. "Not with you standing here in comparison."

She half-smiled, raising her free hand. My eyes followed it, curious, until she rested it just about my dead heart. I shuddered – not only at the image of her pale-white skin matching mine, but also at the heat I felt when she touched, the electricity zinging through my body.

"I promised we would try," I whispered, barely able to force my voice loud enough for her to hear. "If… if I do something wrong, if I hurt you, you must tell me at once.

She nodded solemnly, her eyes on mine. She took a step closer to me and leaned her head against my chest.

"Don't be afraid," she murmured, "We belong together."

And suddenly my world clicked together. Every worry was gone. All my family's and Bella's assurance meant something. I could do this. It won't go wrong. Even when I'm lacking all focus, I could never really hurt her. She'll always be mine.

"Forever," I agreed.

The change in her breathing let me know when she was awake. I slowly ran my fingers up and down her spine, my arms around her.

How could I have been such a fool? I should've known that I would hurt her. It was all selfishness…

I didn't notice at first; I was so giddy afterwards, it was the strangest feeling. It was like… popping bubbles. As she slept, I replayed each and every moment in my mind, how perfect it was. And then I listened to her speak; her voice saying my name made my night even better. But then, they started to appear.

Bruises.

Handprints.

My handprints.

I hurt her.

And now, as she awoke, I could only think of her pain, pain that I had caused.

Then she laughed. What could she possibly laugh at?

"What's funny?"

Her stomach growled, and she laughed again. "You just can't escape being human for very long."

This was what she was thinking about? No, it couldn't be. This was just another distraction…

"Edward? What's wrong?"

"You have to ask?" I hissed, my voice harder than I intended. I stared into her eyes, waiting for her to drop the false happiness and reveal her pain. She didn't however. Her eyes were swimming with joy and so many other mixed emotions. "What are you thinking?" I whispered.

"You're upset. I don't understand. Did I…?" She slowly cut off her own sentence. This infuriated me even more.

"How badly are you hurt, Bella? The truth – don't try to downplay it."

"Hurt?" she squeaked, obviously surprised.

I raised my eyebrow, questioning her denial, watching as she flexed her muscles.

"Why would you jump to that conclusion? I've never been better than I am now," she protested. I closed my eyes, getting upset.

"Stop that."

"Stop _what_?"

"Stop acting like I'm not a monster for having agreed to this!"

"Edward!" she whispered, her voice finally sounding upset. I kept my eyes closed, not wanting to see what I had done. "Don't say that!" she continued.

"Look at yourself, Bella. Then tell me I'm not a monster." I still couldn't bear to look at the pain I'd caused…

I heard her gasp. I ground my teeth in anger… trying to hold back all the emotions I had felt. I promised. I promised her, I promised myself, and everyone else. Yet I still hurt her.

"Why am I covered in feathers?" she questioned.

I exhaled impatiently. "I bit a pillow. Or two." (**AN – personal fav. quote :D**) "That's not what I'm talking about."

"You bit a pillow?" she questioned, "_Why_?"

"Look, Bella!" I almost growled, trying to keep my temper. I opened my eyes and grabbed her hand – as gently as possible – and stretched her arm out. "Look at _that_."

Realization dawned on her face. Her eyes swept up and down her arms, down her ribs. She pulled her arm away and poked at the harsh discolorations, watching it fade and reappear. I then placed my hand, barely touching, onto the dark patches, my fingers lining up with the purple lines.

"Oh," she whispered.

"I'm… so sorry, Bella," I whispered. I couldn't believe I put her in pain. I wanted to throw myself off of a cliff, anything that would cause pain… "I knew better than this. I should not have–" I cut myself off with a slight growl. "I am more sorry than I could tell you." I couldn't allow myself to look at her any longer, so I threw my arm over my face and froze in my spot.

The silence in that moment lasted longer than I could imagine. Then her hand grazed against my arm. I refused to move. She pulled, and tugged, but nothing.

"Edward."

I didn't move.

"Edward?"

Nothing.

"_I'm_ not sorry, Edward. I'm… I can't even tell you. I'm _so _happy. That doesn't even cover it. Don't be angry. Don't. I'm really f–"

"Do not say the word _fine_," I growled, my voice cold. "If you value my sanity, do not say that you are fine."

"But I _am_," she whispered.

"Bella," I groaned. "Don't."

"No. _You _don't, Edward."

I turned my head to her.

"Don't ruin this," she protested. "I. Am. Happy."

"I've already ruined this," I whispered. I had. I had ruined everything the second that I decided that this was okay.

"Cut it out," she snapped. I ground my teeth together to let her speak, trying my hardest to be gentlemanly. I didn't want to hear her protests.

"Ugh!" she groaned. "Why can't you just read my mind already? It's so _inconvenient _to be a mental mute!" My eyes widened a bit. That wasn't what I had been expecting.

"That's a new one. You love that I can't read your mind."

"Not today."

I stared into her eyes, trying to understand. "Why?"

She threw her hands up in frustration, smacking my chest as she brought them back down. I flinched, scared that she'd hurt herself. "Because all this angst would be completely unnecessary if you could see how I feel right now! Or five minutes ago, anyway. I _was _perfectly happy. Totally and completely blissed out. Now – well, I'm sort of pissed, actually."

"You _should_ be mad at me," I retorted.

"Well, I am. Does that make you feel better?"

I sighed. "No. I don't think anything could make me feel better now."

"_That_," she snapped. "That right there is why I'm angry. You are _killing my buzz_, Edward."

I rolled my eyes and shook my head. She was being ridiculous. Why isn't she seeing the problem here? I'm the problem! I watched as she took a deep breath and flexed her limbs once more.

"We knew this was going to be tricky. I thought that was assumed. And then – well, it was a lot easier than I thought it would be. And this is really nothing," she brushed her fingers along my arm. "I think for a first time, not knowing what to expect, we did amazing. With a little practice…"

Practice? _Practice_?! My expression turned livid, I was so angry. Did she _actually _think that I could ever aloud myself to hurt her anymore? Haven't I done enough damage so far? "Assumed? Did you _expect_ this, Bella? Were you anticipating that I would hurt you? Were you thinking it would be worse? Do you consider the experiment a success because you can walk away from it? No broken bones – that equals a victory?"

She waited patiently as I let off my steam. I finally stopped, allowing myself to take deep breaths. I didn't want to make her upset, but I didn't want to hurt her anymore, either. I forced my breathing to return to normal, and to make my expression less livid.

She looked into my eyes. "I didn't know what to expect – but I definitely did not expect how… how… just wonderful and perfect it was." She gazed down, cheeks blushing, and her voice dropped to a whisper. "I mean, I don't know how it was for you, but it was like that for me."

I was shocked. I can't believe she would think like that! How could anyone so perfect, so wonderful and amazing like Bella… how could she think that she wasn't good enough? She would always be the greatest, the best I ever had. I placed a finger under her chin and lifted it up so I could gaze into her eyes once more.

"Is that what you're worried about?" I said through my teeth. "That I didn't _enjoy_ myself?"

She looked away again. "I know it's not the same. You're not human. I was just trying to explain that, for a human, well, I can't imagine that life gets any better than that."

I looked away. I could not believe she would think like that. How could she think, that after everything she had done, and had just did, that I wouldn't appreciate her. That it wasn't the same for me. She made it perfect, my entire life was perfect because of her.

"It seems that I have more to apologize for," I muttered, frowning. "I didn't dream that you would construe the way I feel about what I did to you to mean that last night wasn't… well, the best night of my existence. But I don't want to think of it that way, not when you were…"

She smiled slightly. "Really? The best ever?" she asked in a small voice.

I took her face in my hands, still upset. "I spoke to Carlisle after you and I made our bargain, hoping he could help me. Of course he warned me that this would be very dangerous for you." My eyes darkened. "He had faith in me, though – faith I didn't deserve." I put my finger to her lips before she could interrupt me. "I also asked him what _I _should expect. I didn't know what it would be for me… what with my being a vampire. Carlisle told me it was a very powerful thing, like nothing else. He told me physical love was something I should not treat lightly. With our rarely changing temperaments, strong emotions can alter us in permanent ways. But he said I did not need to worry about that part – you had already altered me so completely." I smiled.

"I spoke to my brothers, too. They told me it was a very great pleasure. Second only to drinking human blood. But I've tasted your blood, and there could be no blood more potent than _that_… I don't think they were wrong, really. Just that it was different for us. Something more."

"It _was_ more. It was everything."

"That doesn't change the fact that it was wrong. Even if it were possible that you really did feel that way."

"What does _that_ mean? Do you think I'm making this up? Why?"

I sighed, frustrated. "To ease my guilt. I can't ignore the evidence, Bella. Or your history of trying to let me off the hook when I make mistakes."

She slipped her finger under my chin, and I looked towards her. "You listen to me, Edward Cullen. I am not pretending anything for your sake, okay? I didn't even know there was a reason to make you feel better until you started being all miserable. _I've_ never been so happy in all my life – I wasn't this happy when youdecided that you loved me more than you wanted to kill me, or the first morning I woke up and you were there wainting for me… Not when I heard your voice in the ballet studio" –– I flinched. –– "or when you said 'I do' and I realized that, somehow, I get to keep you forever. Those are the happiest memories I have, and this is better than any of them. So just deal with it."

I looked into her eyes, which were sincerely happy. But the frown line above her eyebrows just wouldn't fade… "I'm making you unhappy now. I don't want to do that."

"Then don't _you_ be unhappy. That's the only thing that's wrong here."

Oh, but she was so wrong. But I put my thoughts aside, took a deep breath, and nodded. "You're right. The past is past and I can't do anything to change it. There's no sense in letting my mood sour this time for you. I'll do whatever I can to make you happy now."

She examined my face, suspicious. But then a cunning, mischievous grin flashed across her face. "Whatever makes me happy?"

Her stomach growled.

"You're hungry!" I said quickly, trying to grab the first excuse I could find. I leapt out of the bed, which stirred up a cloud of feathers.

"So, why exactly did you decide to ruin Esme's pillows?" she asked, with honest curiosity as she sat up and shook some feathers from her hair. I had already pulled on some loose khaki pants for roaming around the house.

"I don't know if I _decided_ to do anything last night," I muttered. "We're just lucky it was the pillows and not you." I took a deep breath, trying to push away the dark thoughts seeping into my mind. I succeeded, and gave Bella a half-genuine smile. She slipped off the bed, stretching. I turned away from her, not able to look at the bruises. I could almost feel the pain she was in, doubled and striking my heart of ice.

"Do I look that hideous?" she said lightly. I didn't have an answer, I just stood, frozen, trying to clear my thoughts so Bella could be happy. She brushed past me, into the bathroom.

I had almost succeeded when I heard a groan from the bathroom. I was at Bella's side in an instant, worried she was hurt.

"Bella?!"

"I'll _never_ get this all out of my hair!"

"You _would_ be worried about your hair," I mumbled, rolling my eyes. I quickly picked out feather after feather, wishing that Esme had cotton pillows.

"How do you keep from laughing at this? I look ridiculous," she said innocently. She didn't look ridiculous, though. She looked like she had been beaten up by a crazy mob.

"This isn't going to work," she continued when I did not answer. "It's all dried in. I'm going to have to try to wash it out." She turned to me, wrapping her arms around my waist. "Do you want to help me?"

As much as I wished I could, I simply couldn't. "I'd better find some food for you," I whispered, flying into the kitchen. While she was taking her shower, I cooked some scrambled eggs with bacon and cheese, using the difficult task to clear my mind. I was quite proud of it; it looked exactly as it had on the television. I smiled when I heard Bella entering the room.

"Here," I said, passing her the plate. She sat down and began shoveling the eggs into her mouth.

"I'm not feeding you enough," I muttered.

"I was asleep," she retorted. "This is really good, by the way. Impressive for someone who doesn't eat."

"Food Network," I said cheekily, smiling.

"Where did the eggs come from?"

"I asked the cleaning crew to stock the kitchen. A first, for this place. I'll have to ask them to deal with the feathers…" I looked away again, the horrid thoughts creeping back into my mind. Bella was hurt. It was my fault.

"Thank you," Bella told me as she finished, leaning across to kiss me. I kissed her back automatically. She was so, so sweet…

But then I had to pull away. What if I hurt her again?

She realized my plan just as I had made it in my head. "You're not going to touch me again while we're here, are you?"

I hesitated, unsure what to say. Then I smiled and raised my hand to stroke her cheek.

"You know that's not what I meant," she frowned.

I sighed, wishing this conversation was over. It was as hard for me as it was for her. "I know. And you're right. I will not make love with you until you've been changed. I will never hurt you again."

**AN – Taadaaaa! Sorry again. Not many people reviewed, so I wasn't very inspired. I didn't mean to, but I couldn't help but forget about you :( I think the moral of the story is… please review, because I really need it! And in return, I'll update! Also, let me know if Edward's getting OOC. It may be a little boring for now, because I'm mainly writing scenes that are already quote by quote from the book… I simply cannot change Stephenie Meyer's amazing writing. However, for the scenes where Edward's moves aren't already dictated,**** it will get less boring.**

**Please continue to review! Once again, I really need it and I'm sorry :( SPREAD THE WORD. You know you want your friends to read this ;)**


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